Category: Justin Trudeau
Idris Elba Hints That Sophie Trudeau Is The One Who Gave Him Coronavirus
Now when I said that everyone involved in Cats should be punished, I did not mean for God to give Idris Elba coronavirus! Idris gave us an update on his condition on a livestream and he sort of hinted that he contracted COVID-19 from Canada’s own First Lady, Sophie Trudeau.
Idris Elba Tested Positive For COVID-19
Shit. Just. Got. Real. Forget what you’ve seen on the news about resource hoarding, plummeting global markets and complete societal collapse. We now have a real international crisis on our hands. The only person People Magazine ever correctly designated as the Sexiest Man Alive, Idris Elba, has tested positive for COVID-19. Idris made the announcement from his home where he is currently in self-quarantine with his wife, Sabrina Dhowre (who has not been tested), via Twitter. Tom and Rita who? They’re just Chet Hanks’ parents now.
Princess Anne Might Have Gotten Caught Gossiping About Trump, But She Probably Doesn’t Care
Leaders from North America, Europe, and the UK are currently in London for the 70th annual NATO summit. And whenever Canada’s invited to the party, you can be sure that Prime Minister Justin Trudeau will inevitably become the default belle of said ball. Sometimes the spotlight is stolen by Angela Merkel, depending on if she feels up to busting out one of her signature unimpressed looks. But an unlikely dark horse has galloped from the rear and stole the spotlight at this year’s NATO summit, and it was Queen Elizabeth’s only daughter, Princess Anne.
Joseph Gordon-Levitt Taught Justin Trudeau That It’s Okay For Men To Be Feminists
Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau is an out and proud feminist, and when he’s not making people shoot out a geyser of maple syrup foam into their pantaloons by throwing them a Sweet Valley High cover model smile, he’s making people shoot out a geyser of maple syrup foam into their pantaloons by supporting women’s rights. But there was a time not too long ago when Justin Trudeau didn’t know that men could be feminists. But then while watching a video of Joseph Gordon-Levitt in 2014, PM Trudeau learned that it is okay for men to say they are feminists. His mind was blown the same way my mind was blown when I learned that cats aren’t only girls and dogs aren’t only boys. No, I didn’t just learn that last week. It was last month, you stupid asshole.
Open Post: Hosted By A Shetland Pony Earning A Trip To The Gallows!
THE QUEEN was in Scotland this week and on her itinerary was a little kiki with Canadian panty creamer extraordinaire Justin Trudeau as well as a visit to Stirling Castle. My guess is that THE QUEEN visited Stirling Castle first and I’m only saying that because she wouldn’t be able to visit any castle if she had met up with Trudeau beforehand. She’d be unable to walk due to being laid out on a velvet settee with a serious case of the vapors.
While sashaying into Stirling Castle, THE QUEEN was met by an uncouth Shetland pony (“More like Shitland pony.” – THE QUEEN, probably) who shamelessly tried to steal her flowers. The common thief, we’ll call Lindsay LoPony, nibbled on THE QUEEN’s bouquet (that sounded wrong) and she hit that crook back with some sass. She pulled her flowers back and told the pony to go away and then she pet the pony’s nose. And I’m sure that she also whispered to one of her minions, “Send that pony to the worst glue factory in Scotland!”
And honestly, that pony is probably a Morrissey fan. Look at that hair. That pony’s totally emo.
Open Post: Hosted By A Canadian Dreamboat Meeting An English Dreamboat
I should be mad at Justin Trudeau’s son Xavier Trudeau for messing up this picture by getting in the middle, but I’m not and I can’t be, because it looks like he too is mesmerized by the majestic flaming torch that is Prince Hot Ginge’s luscious…ly thinning hair of sparkling ginger perfection.
On Sunday, Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau was in the town of Vimy in France with his son and his wife Sophie Gregoire for the 100th anniversary of the Battle of Vimy Ridge. Prince Hot Ginge, Prince William and Prince Charles were there too. It was a serious event about a serious moment in history, and since I always act with the utmost decorum, I will keep my fanfic piece about JT and PHG (yes, it involves maple-flavored lube) for another post.
For now, I leave you with these pictures from Sunday, including pictures of Prince William internally weeping with jealousy while staring at the enchanted and lush moose forest on top of JT’s head. And I’ve decided that I like Xavier Trudeau and what convinced me is the picture of him lighting up as his mom gets close to PHG. It’s as if he’s thinking, “Can he be my new dad?!”
Pics: Wenn.com