Britney Spears is reportedly going to be writing a tell-all memoir and she’s supposedly getting PAID for it! 40-year-old Brit Brit was recently freed from her nearly 13-year long conservatorship and has been tearing up her family on Instagram ever since. Her father, Jamie Spears, her mother, Lynne Spears, and even her sister, Jamie Lynn Spears, have been the targets of Britney’s ire as she continues to reveal all the alleged horrible bullshit they put her through mentally and physically for over a decade. And don’t even ask Britney about her sister’s memoir, Things I Should Have Said. Now it’s time for her to put her own words into writing and tear her family up in a book and not just long-winded Instagram posts full of emojis! And Page Six says that Britney’s earning $15 million for it. The way she has so many songs to pick a book title from. “Stronger Than Yesterday,” “Why Do These Tears Come At Night?,” “Don’t You Know That You’re Toxic?,” but personally I think she should just name it “It’s Britney, Bitch,” and call it a day.
Britney Spears‘ new lawyer, Matthew Rosengart, is That Girl and he is not afraid to fuck shit up! He successfully freed Britney from her 13-year-long conservatorship and ever since, she’s been spinning and twirling, and hinting at babies with her fiancé, Sam Asghari. But Matthew’s work is far from over, and Jamie Spears is in his crosshairs as Daddy Spears asked Britney’s estate to cover his legal fees as he leaves the conservatorship. Matthew has words for that–one in particular: “abomination!”
Not even one day after Britney Spears and her fiance Sam Asghari declared with their chichis to #FreeBritney on his Instagram, Judge Brenda Penny has finally granted her wish and tossed her conservatorship into the shit-can, effective immediately, after 13 years. And as the #FreeBritney movement cheers, I’m sure that Brit Brit’s dad/ex-conservator, Jamie Spears, is stealthily tiptoeing away like, “Yay. Everybody celebrate and don’t at all pay attention to me as I sneak away before my former little ATM hits me with a lawsuit.”
When it comes to people getting paid, it’s not too bold of a statement to suggest that everyone deserves to be compensated fairly for their work (has Grimes fake-read that chapter yet?). But for the past couple of years, the internet has proved that some Britney Spears fans were more than willing to work for her freedom for free. Figuratively and literally, the only compensation they wanted was freedom. The #FreeBritney movement worked overtime to see Britney Spears be released from her conservatorship, and she’s almost there. Britney recently acknowledged her #FreeBritney army, and let them know that all her recent conservatorship wins couldn’t have been achieved without them.
After The Court Moved Britney Spears One Step Closer To Freedom, She Freed Her Body Of Clothes On Instagram
On Wednesday, as Britney Spears’ lawyer, Mathew Rosengart, was in court searing her father Jamie Spears’ skin with brands that read “ABUSIVE” and “CRUEL,” Britney herself seemed to be unbothered while flying off to some tropical locale with her betrothed Sam Asghari. After Judge Brenda Penny pink-slipped Daddy Spears as Britney’s conservator of 13 years, and temporarily replaced him with forensic CPA John Zabel, she posted an Instagram video of her flying free in paradise and then posted pictures of her freeing her parts. #FreeBritneyHerNipplesHerAsscrackAndHerChocha.
If you’re in the Los Angeles area, hold onto something tight, because Britney Spears is going to create some gale force winds (Santa Ana winds, WHO?!) while cartwheeling and twirling something extra over the news that her dad, Jamie Spears, is no longer a part of her 13-year conservatorship. Three months after Brit Brit told the court that she wants to be free of the shackles of her conservatorship, and more importantly, wants Daddy Spears to longer be in charge of any part of her life, the judge granted her wish. And while Daddy Spears makes his way out the exit door, he’ll probably snatch a few more coins from Brit Brit’s pocketbook because he’s going to need to invest in an extra-wide toilet since her new attorney, Mathew Rosengart, tore him another asshole in today’s hearing.