Category: Drew Barrymore
Open Post: Hosted By Drew Barrymore Getting Stood Up By A Dude She Met On A Celebrity Dating App
And as a fucking attempted coup goes down, here’s some fluffiest fluff fluff fluff.
Online dating effing blows. It actually destroys a teeny piece of your soul each time you’re rejected by some bonehead who lives in a basement apartment with his brother who says he’s a writer but has only ever worked at the pizza restaurant two blocks from your apartment. And then you’re forced to see him every single day for the next four years, cuz the restaurant windows are huge, and that’s the route you take to get home from the subway. And the food there actually looks delicious, but you can never go in because it’s always that schmuck Damian slingin’ their scrumptious pizza pies straight outta the wood burning oven!
Phew! ANYWAY, comedian Nikki Glaser was on The Drew Barrymore Show earlier this week, and the topic turned to dating apps. That’s when THEE Drew Barrymore revealed that even she, a former Charlie’s Angel, had been stood up by some loser on a celebrity dating app (*cough* Raya).
“The Drew Barrymore Show” Got Shit For Giving A High School Teacher And His Alleged Former Student Their “Fairytale Wedding”
Last Friday Drew Barrymore and The Drew Barrymore Show threw a surprise wedding for a Connecticut couple. The bride, Selina, thought she was on the show to discuss being a frontline nurse and postponing her wedding due to the pandemic. But Drew and Dan, the groom, secretly planned an in-studio wedding officiated by Dan’s sister, with all their friends and family Zooming in from home. Awwww. But there’s a hitch (wedding pun): On the show, Dan and Selina claimed they “met several years ago in school through mutual friends”. But, according to online commenters, they actually met because Dan was Selina’s high school physics teacher. Like, when she was an underage teen. Record scratch.
Sharon Stone Is “Done Dating” Because The Men She Meets Are “Insincere”
Sharon Stone was on The Drew Barrymore Show, which is still on, and she and Drew Barrymore got to talking about how Sharon is off the market. And not because she’s found a man, but because she has finally realized at 62 that men ain’t worth shit and she doesn’t have time for it anymore. Good for her! I’m only amazed it took her to 62 years of age to get fed up with men–I already am at 30.
Drew Barrymore And Tom Green Reunited On Her Talk Show––18 Years After Divorcing
Drew Barrymore’s fuckery-filled daytime talk show just finished up its second week. And yesterday, Drew invited her former husband of 15 months, Tom Green, onto the socially distanced set of her show to catch up on old times. And it was as awkward and cute as you can imagine two exes reuniting on a daytime talk show would be.
Charlize Theron Says She Hasn’t Dated In Five Years
In 2015, Charlize Theron wisely ended her one-year relationship with Sean Penn by probably ghosting him. A full five years later, and she’s yet to date again. Damn, Sean turned her off romance for life! Charlize revealed her dating drought on Drew Barrymore’s new daytime talk show. A few months ago she told Howard Stern that her relationship with Sean was exclusive, but she never wanted to marry him. In fact, she never wants to marry anybody. She told Drew that she’s happy with her life and her family, and she hasn’t dated anybody in five years. Girl’s girl Drew was all, “OMG ME TOO!”
Drew Barrymore Says She’ll Never Get Married Again
When I think Drew Barrymore, I think of child rehab, Charlie’s Angels, daisies, and the term “hopeless romantic” (her words). Hence all the failed marriages. Number one was way back in ’95, to bar owner Jeremy Thomas. They broke up after two months. Then she got hitched to Tom Green (pictured above in all his Canuck goateed glory), and that survived five months (improvement!). Her third husband was art consultant/son of the former CEO of Chanel (oo la la!) Will Kopelman,. Will is also the father of her two daughters, Olive, 7, and Frankie, 6. They lasted an entire presidential term: 2012-2016, which is eons in Barrymore marriage time. According to math, patterns, and exponents, 45-year-old Drew’s next marriage should last roughly fifty years. But she insists she’s done with that shit.