Category: Andy Dick

There’s An Arrest Warrant Out For Andy Dick For Allegedly Groping An Uber Driver

September 23, 2019 / Posted by:

Miraculously, Andy Dick still has hands and a penis with which to menace the population. I’d have thought one of his victims would have lobbed off his offending appendages by now, but no. He’s still out here in the streets groping people’s private parts and being a hot mess. Allegedly.

According to TMZ, an arrest warrant has been issued for Andy stemming from a 2018 incident in which Andy allegedly groped an Uber driver. While he was driving. From the back seat! That takes a skill and dedication to the craft that only a rare few serial gropers can ever hope to achieve. Andy should be the subject of the next season of Unbelievable.

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Andy Dick Got Charged With Sexual Battery

July 2, 2018 / Posted by:

Full-time disaster and part-time comedian, Andy Dick, has been hit with some more criminal charges. I’m telling you: this man has more problems with the law than he does IMDB credits.

TMZ listened to the whisperings of their sources in law enforcement and found out that a woman filed a police report saying that in April that Andy, “squeezed her butt twice as he walked past her on a sidewalk“. She claims he also tossed some “lewd comments” her way, because what kind of a butt groping is complete without also hurling some despicable remarks? NONE! Continue reading

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Andy Dick Got Fired For Sexual Harassment

October 31, 2017 / Posted by:

Those kittens want off that scary ride.

Thoroughly unpleasant and formerly popular mess Andy Dick, 51, was fired for sexually harassing humans on the set of some independent movie that no one will ever see. The Hollywood Reporter says that Dick was dropped from the cast of Raising Buchanan after he was accused of behavior like “groping people’s genitals, unwanted kissing/licking and sexual propositions of at least four members of the production.” Go big or go home, eh Dick? Continue reading

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Kevin Federline Has Made His Triumphant Return To Rap, And His Face Says Everything About That

April 7, 2016 / Posted by:

It’s been over 10 long years since rap master Kevin Federline sharted out “PopoZão” and taught us that it’s possible to caca through our ear holes. The saying “genius takes time” is true and this newest work of art proves it. It took the Mozart of rap a decade to release a song that’ll make you wish Tampax made tiny tampons for your ears. Listening to it won’t cause you to caca through your ear holes, but you will bleed.

Throw on your Von Dutch trucker hat, pop your collar and put your Motorola Razr on mute, because TMZ has taken us all the way back to 2005 by posting KFed’s new video “Hollywood,” which also stars Andy Dick and Aaron Carter’s flow coach Crichy Crinch, whose claim to fame is getting Tara Reid’s name tattooed onto his arm. This mess is so 2005 that it’s practically a Four Loko stain on a pink UGG.

But KFed did manage to bring it to the NOW thanks to a scene where a fourth-tier Amber Rose impersonator (who looks more like a third-tier Susan Powter impersonator) and a fifth-tier Kanye West impersonator (who looks more like a fourth-tier Ray-J impersonator) get into some #FingersInTheBootyAssBitch action. The Amber/Kanye scene is pretty disappointing, because I doubt the booty hole Jesus uses drugstore lube like a normal peon. Kanye’s b-hole is probably self-lubricating, and not only that, but KFed missed an opportunity to make a “PooPooOw” joke.

There’s also a bootleg Leonardo DiCaprio impersonator in this for some reason. Brit Brit Spears must’ve cut KFed’s child support payments, because it’s obvious that everybody involved in this worked for dusty copies of Playing With Fire.

Believe it or not, the most painful part of that video isn’t the song or the sight of Andy Dick getting off while wiping his asshole with KFed’s CD. What’s really painful is that I still look at KFed and think to myself that I’d totally let him PopoZão me. No, I don’t love myself.

And here’s KFed looking like STAINS‘ strung out second cousin at Crazy Horse III in Las Vegas last December.

Pics: Wenn.com

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