A couple of weeks ago VoteForTheWorst posted pictures of American Idol contestant David Hernandez supposedly working as a stripper in some gay bar. I’m guessing the chicks in the picture above are just his hags. Well, it’s been confirmed that he used to shake his nuts and berries at a gay bar in Glendale, AZ.

A manager at Dick’s Cabaret told the Associated Press, “He had the look and the type that people like, so he made pretty good money here.” The manager said he stopped working there in September of 2007. David apparently got fully nude.

Big deal! Who hasn’t stripped in a gay bar before? American Idol had no comment and it was not known if he was going to be kicked off the show. Kicked off? David is a good singer, but he might get more votes if he incorporated his strip routine while he was singing. Paula would probably go into a seizure and foam at the mouth.

There’s also rumors that David is gay and has been with the same dude for 2 years. Again, big fucking deal! They are all gay strippers on that show. I’m sure Simon Cowell has twirled his ass lips at least a couple of times for dirty old men.

Free Daisy from her Louis Vuitton prison! Actually, that shit looks nicer than my apartment and bigger too. A make-up free Jessica Simpson arrived at JFK yesterday with Daisy in hand. I can’t stand this frog, but she looks a million times better without make-up and she’s keeping her mouth shut!

In other Chestica news, she’s going to Kuwait again! Ches wrote on SweetKisses:

“Hey ya’ll. I just wanted to say hi, and let you know that I am hard at work on my country record, and I can’t wait to share it will all of you. I am heading to Kuwait to do a show for the troops for Operation MySpace, then back in the studio. I love you all and am so blessed by the support and love you show me everyday!! xoxo jess“

Oh Ches! I think you’re the only one that can’t wait for your country album to be released. I guess something has to sit in the Wal-Mart clearance section. I think Daisy wants to go to Kuwait too and she wants to be left there, so she won’t have to deal with Ches anymore. I bet Daisy makes a ferocious soldier. And how many times do you think Ches had to google Koowaite to make sure she was spelling it right? At least a million times. I totally spelled Kuwait wrong on purpose to see if you were awake. Ok, I’m lying.

Ashton Kutcher’s 30th Birthday party at Socialista in NYC might have become a party for Hep instead! The New York City Health Department announced that a bartender at the joint tested positive for Hepatitis A. The bartender only worked three nights and one of those nights was February 7th, Ashton’s Birthday party. The bartender also worked on the 8th and 11th. The Health Dept. has asked that everyone who attended the party get vaccinated right away.

Guests at Ashton’s party included, Bruce Willis, Demi Moore, Madonna, Lucy Liu, Gwyneth Paltrow, Liv Tyler, Eric Dane, Rebecca Gayheart, Salma Hayek and Roberto Cavalli.

Hep A is less serious form of Hep and will usually keep you in bed for a couple of weeks, but you won’t die. The bartender reportedly caught it on a recent trip to Honduras.

A celebrity Hep scare and Paris Hilton isn’t to blame?! She must be kind of bummed.

This is why it’s so hard to eat delicious snacks at a bar. I’m so afraid of catching Hep A, but I can’t help it. The snacks are so tasty even if they have a coating of Hep! That’s probably what keeps them crunchy.

Source – Image: INFDaily.com

Did my imagination escape from my brain, start a movie studio and produce this masterpiece without me knowing it? This movie is what my dreams are made of. It’s called “Circus Island” and it stars Audrey Landers, Judy Landers, The New Landers Sisters and Daniel Landers. You can never have too many Landers in one movie.

This movie is about some magical island and the dysfunctional family that owns it. They are in danger of losing the island, so they decide to turn it into a circus camp for kids. Yeah, because that’s such a money-maker. There’s also other plots going on, but I am too blinded by the beauty of the Landers. Who gives a fuck what it’s about. The Landers are in it! The only way this movie could be better is if Phoebe Price had a fabulous musical sequence in it involving flamingos.

They better dust off their awards shelf now.

Thanks Amy

Poor 73-year-old Lawrence Nicastro. He was going through some storage items last year at his Las Vegas home when he found a poster-size image of what he thought to be Marilyn Monroe hitchhiking naked. The poster was actually Madonna from her “Sex” book. Lawrence didn’t know that yet and it would take him months to figure it out.

Lawrence spent four months researching the origin of the photo with his wife, Phyllis. He finally called in a Marilyn Monroe expert, Chris Harris. Chris also believed that Lawrence had come across something special.

The two scheduled a press conference for today to unveil their treasure! Thankfully for them they gave the Associated Press a sneak preview. That’s when they learned the bad news.

Chris said he plans to go on with the press conference to face the music. He said the only person that wins in all of this is Madonna, “Who wins here? Madonna, of course. She really looks like Marilyn Monroe.”

She totally does look like Marilyn Monroe! Well, if you’re 73, have sight in only eye, live near railroad tracks and the photo was badly damaged in a flood. I would think that the SUVs would give it away. That’s just me though.

I can’t wait until Lawrence discovers the Lindsay Lohan as Marilyn Monrore pictures in 10-years time.

Shawn Lonsdale was one of Scientology’s harshest critics. He directed his own anti-Scientology documentary and also became a fixture in Clearwater for standing outside Scientology offices and filming workers coming and going. He was found dead of an apparent suicide in his home in Clearwater, FL this past weekend reports Tampa Bay Online. He was 39. Police spokesperson, Elizabeth Daly-Watts, said there was no evidence of foul play and a suicide note was found at the scene. Police found a garden hose running from his car to his home.

Shawn was never a Scientologist, but became intrigued by the church after reading about them. He then began to work on exposing the church and annoying its members. Scientologists fought back by hiring a private investigator to look into his past. They found several charges against him related to sex with men in public and posted fliers around town warning everyone about him. It’s been reported that they included his social security number on the fliers.

Radar reports that several Internet message board posters aren’t so sure about the foul play part. They said Scientology members constantly harassed him and may have driven him to suicide. One poster wrote, “An apparent suicide? Maybe it was staged to look like a suicide. Has anyone noticed how many Off-Duty Officers work for Scientology! These will be the same officers investigating this Suicide???? An investigation with Impartiality? Justice Denied?”

One poster on Tampa Bay’s site claims the Police spokesperson might be a Scientologist. They wrote, “Interesting that the police spokeswoman would be Elizabeth Daly-Watts considering she’s a scientologist herself. A quick search of Google will follow that up . Somethings fishy here”

In the past recent months Shawn had basically stopped all his anti-Scientology activity. He stopped posting on his website and on message board.

Gulp. I’m not saying SHIT! Hail Tommy! Hail Travolta! Hail Alley! Hail Bart Simpson! I don’t want to take a trip to Space. I think I’ll go lay under the covers now, holding my Xenu doll.

They better ask Kristie Alley what she was doing this weekend. She’s already pissed after the Jenny Craig shit. Ask her!