In 2007, Jessica Simpson attended the Met Gala (seen above with Roberto Cavalli, who made her dress). There’s one thing that sticks out to me about Jessica’s look more than a decade later, and it’s pretty obvious. That Clairol Natural Instincts brown is definitely not Jessica’s color. But for former Vogue digital director Sally Singer, it’s Jessica’s open-faced Chestica situation. Sally recently wrote about Jessica’s Met Gala boobs for Vogue’s online oral history of the Met Gala. Jessica didn’t love it and had something to say about it.
Many people and companies have stopped wearing and using real fur. THE QUEEN is not wearing fur anymore, and Versace ditched fur. But not Jessica Simpson! Jessica still wears fur (see above: Jessica looking like a 70s Elle Woods in a fox fur-trimmed coat from Saks Potts) and the protestors are letting her have it during the tour to promote her memoir Open Book. But luckily for Jessica, they’re not throwing red paint and flour at her, they’re just throwing their words at her. And she’s responding to them by bringing God into it.
The return of Jessica Simpson is upon us thanks to her memoir Open Book. So far we’ve learned that she’s a survivor of child abuse, got sober after her relationship with John Mayer drove her to drink, and confirmed that Justin Timberlake is a certified douche. Now Papa Joe has made a guest appearance, and Jessica writes in her memoirs that he “betrayed” her mother and they keep talk of his sexuality in the closet.
Jessica Simpson is out there selling her memoir, Open Book, and she’s already been open about being sober, how her relationship to John Mayer caused her to pick up the bottle, and how reality TV did what reality TV does: destroy marriages. And about that marriage that reality TV destroyed, Jessica says that after she divorced Nick Lachey, she treated herself to a lip lockin’ session with Justin Timberlake that ended very badly.
Jessica Simpson’s new memoir, Open Book, has already provided us with the very sad revelations that she used to self medicate with booze and pills to bury the memories of childhood abuse, that she was forced to get sober after being unable to get her kids dressed for Halloween, and that John Mayer was kind of a dick (although that’s not really a revelation). Thankfully, there are also some less-sad stories in her memoir. Actually, I take it back. This will be devastating to anyone who was a committed fan of MTV’s Newlyweds.
Jessica has opened up about being one-half of one of the most famous reality TV couples of all time, as well as what she thinks ended her marriage to Nick Lachey. Unlike some juicier celebrity splits, no one cheated or did anyone dirty. Jessica says there were a lot of factors that just kind of doomed the whole thing right from the beginning.
We’re in the renaissance of the old-school People Magazine article where celebrities spill news and emotions. We used to live in a time where a famous type would never call up People to give them news and would still spill it all on Instagram, but Michelle Williams let us know that she’s got two new additions to her body (an unborn baby and an engagement ring) through People, and now Jessica Simpson has gotten deep and brave through People about the sexual abuse she suffered and her addiction to alcohol and pills. Jessica is now over two years sober and is telling her story in her new memoir and in a cover story for People. Since the People cover story is back, Papa Joe Simpson should follow his daughter’s lead and reboot Clay Aiken’s “Yes, I’m Gay” cover with a “Yes, I’m A Photographer And Still Not Gay, Dammit” cover while cradling his newest twink protégé.