Category: Mariah Carey

Mariah Carey Thinks One Direction And The Chainsmokers Are The Same Thing

February 14, 2019 / Posted by:

I always knew it must be nice to live in the fantasy land where Mariah Carey’s brain skips, and now we know that it is planted firmly in 2010 when One Direction was getting plucked into fame on The X FactorAndrew Taggart and Alex Pall, known by me as straight douchebags and known by most people as The Chainsmokers, were on a radio interview the other day. Alex mentioned how they met Mariah one time, only Mariah – presumably not hearing those two have British accents – thought they were a British boy band. Continue reading


Open Post: Hosted By Mariah Carey’s Version Of The 10-Year Challenge

January 17, 2019 / Posted by:

Social media’s “I’m attention-starved and need gratification!” moment du jour is the 10-year challenge. It’s why your news feed is clogged with split-screen photos of people you went to high school with bragging about how great their moisturizer routine is by showing a self-photo from 2009 and one from 2019. Only, the 2009 one looks like Kendall Jenner’s Proactiv ad, and the 2019 one looks like Yoda. Someone whose 10-year challenge is not here for any wrinkling is Mariah Carey, dahhhling. She posted her own, uh, attempt at it, and it seems like we’re going to have to go find old episodes of TRL on YouTube if we want to see 2009 Mariah.

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Mariah Carey Is Being Sued By Her Alleged Blackmailer Who Claims She Suffered Abuse While In Her Employ

January 17, 2019 / Posted by:

Mariah’s house is a fucking mess. And I’m not talking empty champagne bottles strewn about, or half-eaten sandwiches forgetfully placed on bookshelves (shut up, you don’t know my life!). I’m talking about The Help. Did Mariah Carey hire her personal assistant Lianna Azarian and former manager Stella Bulochnikov off of Craigslist or something? As you know, Mariah is currently suing Lianna for blackmail. Well, according to TMZ, Lianna is suing Mariah right back for turning a blind eye while Stella physically and verbally abused her (allegedly). Lianna claims Stella used to slap her titties and ass, put things like remote controls and utensils (!?) under her titties, pissed on her, and called her names like “fucking Armenian whore” and the N-word. Mariah Carey! What is going on over there!?!?

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Open Post: Hosted By JLo Singing Her Rival’s Christmas Song

December 26, 2018 / Posted by:

If you caught a movie this weekend, it was either Aquaman, Mary Poppins Returns, or Bumblebee– or you were like me and slothed on the couch watching The Holiday for the 500th time wondering how Kate Winslet was able to buy a last-minute London-Los Angeles flight on a journalist salary. Well, there’s another movie out, and that’s Jennifer Lopez’s Second Act. The movie came in seventh at the box office this weekend with $6.5 million, which is probably JLo’s monthly credit card bill – so she has to draw some eyeballs to this thing!

What better way to remind people that, Mariah Carey be damned, JLo DOES know Mariah AND her music. Continue reading

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