Archives: August 2016

Did The Rock And Vin Diesel Play With Our Emotions For The Sake Of Cheap Publicity?!

August 24, 2016 / Posted by:

The Rock v. Vin Diesel beef mostly smelled like candy, ass and boiled Muscle Milk, but if you put your nostrils close enough to it, you’d swear that you could also smell the scent of STUNT (which smells like every Taylor Swift perfume mixed together). Life & Style says that you smelled right. Their sources claim that the two buff billiard balls do have their differences, but they decided to take their feud, pull its pants down and shoot its ass up with gallons of steroids. They are playing up their beef so they can “have it out” in a WWE match that will promote Fast 8. Fast 8 opens on April 14, 2017 and WrestleMania 33 is happening on April 2, 2017.

The “This Generation Sucks” Apple Doesn’t Fall Far From The Tree

August 24, 2016 / Posted by:

Earlier this month, professional cranky old man Clint Eastwood did an interview with his mimbo son Scott Eastwood for Esquire in which he proceeded to make like everyone’s loudmouth grandpa at an awkward family dinner by griping about “political correctness” and the “pussy generation.” It turns out Scott is proudly on Team No Pussies with his papa. And he has just as much to say about this generation of candy-ass coddled pussies as Clint.

SHARE

Open Post: Hosted By A Russian Pussy And Her Baby Squirrel Monkey Child

August 24, 2016 / Posted by:

So far today we’ve posted about abortion, anorexia, racist trolls and even more disturbing, the relationship between Tom Hiddleston and Taylor Swift, so I figured this place needed some lightness and cuteness. So here’s this awww-inducing video from Russia (aka the country that Lindsay Lohan will soon be the First Lady of) starring a 16-year-old cat named Rosinka and the abandoned baby squirrel monkey named Fyodor who now calls her mама. The Associated Press says that Fyodor became an orphan after his mom decided that, you know, she just doesn’t want to be tied down to a child and wants to run off to the big city to try to be a singer. Story as old as time!

Fyodor and his EX-MOM were living at a zoo in the Siberian city of Tyumen and the director, Tatyana Antropova, took him home with her one day. Tatyana’s cat Rosinka and Fyodor immediately bonded, and even though she’s old and over it (see: picture above), she still plays with him. Fyodor will eventually go back to the zoo in a month, but for now, he’s loving life with his pussy mom. This video of them features a guest appearance by the Russian Anne of Green Gables.

It’s nice knowing that there’s a tinge of sweetness in this shitty world. (P.S. – If you later read that Rosinka had it with Fyodor and ate him, don’t tell me. I don’t want to know. It’ll be our first secret.)

Tags:
SHARE

Jennifer Lopez And Casper Smart Have Broken Up Again

August 24, 2016 / Posted by:

If you own a pawn shop, take a good look at all that jewelry on Casper Smart’s body. You’ll want to have an appraisal estimate handy in case he swings by. It’s been a while since Casper the Kept Man has had to pay for anything on his own, and I’m sure he’ll want to liquidate some of his assets once he realizes how much the cost of living has risen.

And Just Like That, Amy Schumer Has Earned A Spot On Anna Wintour’s Shit List

August 24, 2016 / Posted by:

There’s a good reason for why in that picture Amy Schumer looks like she’d rather be taking selfies with fans while getting a pap smear from Edward Scissorhands in the middle of a subway platform in August. That’s because she would! Amy put on that busted dress to go to the parade of fancy assholes known as the Met Gala, and she told Howard Stern that it may as well have been held at a labor camp in North Korea, because it was torture! Let’s all join hands and say a prayer of thanks to the lord for the fact that Amy Schumer was somehow able to get through the pain and suffering of sipping fine champagne while staring at Idris Elba in a tux. She is so brave. So strong.

SHARE

src="https://c.statcounter.com/922697/0/f674ac4a/1/"
alt="drupal analytics" >