Category: Simon Cowell

Simon Cowell Says He’s Done With Botox

April 11, 2022 / Posted by:

Simon Cowell has announced that he’s officially done with Botox and fillers. He shared this very important information in an interview with The Sun. 62-year-old Simon claims that he currently has zero filler left in his face, and his “new look” (heh?) is due to healthy eating, drinking lots of water, and losing three stone (42 pounds). He admits that “there was a stage when I might have gone a bit too far,” and that his own son, 8-year-old Eric, was in “hysterics” over his appearance. Wow. Usually, little Eric is in hysterics over his father’s shitty personality. Big change! Continue reading

Simon Cowell Broke His Arm In Another Electric Bike Accident

February 2, 2022 / Posted by:

Ruh-roh! Simon Cowell has injured himself falling off an electric bike. Nope, you aren’t experiencing a blip in the Matrix. This exact thing happened back in August 2020. Simon broke his back in an e-bike accident, had to get emergency spinal surgery, and was bedridden for months. Luckily, this new injury sounds a lot less serious; the 62-year-old walked away with a mere broken arm. When reached for comment, the electric bike said, “Yeah, I thought I’d let him off easy. But next time, I’m takin’ his eyes.”

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Open Post: Hosted By Paula Abdul Calling Simon Cowell “The STD”

April 13, 2021 / Posted by:

Paula Abdul may not be able to name a single winner of the rebooted American Idol but that doesn’t mean she’s going to turn down a check from them! After country singer and judge, Luke Bryan, revealed yesterday that he had contracted COVID-19, it was announced that Paula would fill in for him when the show started the first live shows. She sure filled that space; using her return to the Idol stage to call former original judge Simon Cowell “the STD.”

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Simon Cowell Will Be On Bedrest For Six More Months Following His Bike Accident

October 12, 2020 / Posted by:

Back in early August, Simon Cowell broke his back in an electric bike accident. He fell while testing his new $20,000 bike in the courtyard of his Malibu compound (oo, la la!) in front of his 6-year-old son Eric and 14-year-old stepson Adam. Simon had to get spinal surgery, which sounds scary and serious. But mere days later his America’s Got Talent co-star, Howie Mandel, said the injured 61-year-old was doing “spectacularly well, considering”, and was expected to return to his AGT gig before season’s end (didn’t happen). Then, this weekend, a source close to Simon denied reports he was in rough shape, and he was, in fact, walking 10,000 steps a day (wow, 9,900 more steps than my record!). That source joked that Simon’s girlfriend Lauren Silverman had to “run to keep up with him.” Uh huuuh.

Welp, I guess either that was a load of baloney, or walking 10k steps a day on a broken back maybe isn’t a great idea, because now sources are saying Simon must remain bed-ridden for six months. He’s on a cocktail of strong painkillers, has round-the-clock nurse care, and must wear a brace.

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Simon Cowell Broke His Back From Falling Off Of An Electric Bike

August 9, 2020 / Posted by:

Simon Cowell got into a scary situation over the weekend and was taken to the hospital after falling off his electric bike, an electric bike that he was riding around his own compound in Malibu. This is why it’s much, much safer to never ever leave your couch. At least that’s what I tell myself. But does Sharon Osbourne have an alibi? Or Gabrielle Union?

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Gabrielle Union Talked About Simon Cowell’s Indoor Smoking On “AGT” And NBC’s Racial Discrimination Investigation 

June 18, 2020 / Posted by:

Gabrielle Union got into a very public shitstorm with America’s Got Talent as well as NBC, Fremantle, and Syco over alleged racist and sexist shit that happened on-and-off camera. She was fired from the series after one season and alleged it was because she spoke out about discrimination. NBC sort of acknowledged they can do better and said they were working with Gabrielle on investigating her claims. Well, Gabrielle says NBC’s investigation was botched from the getgo and they never fairly looked into possible discrimination. Gabrielle also got into Simon Cowell’s asshole ways. Simon Cowell is an asshole?! This is brand new information!

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