Did you think that just because Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt are now closer to divorce that the stories about her being an evil demon bitch would stop? Of course not! Angie and Brad’s son Maddox is off to higher education, but it seems he’s also now playing a bigger role in his parents’ affairs–even though they are fully not together. It seems that role is one being orchestrated by mommy dearest–as Page Six says that Demon Queen Maleficent is back again and is using Maddox against Brad.
There was a time when Angelina Jolie was all about leather pants, blood vial necklaces, making out on red carpets, and bad-ass dragon tattoos. Then she started growing her family, and before you knew it, she was Angelina Jolie, wrangler of six little kids and Brad Pitt. But now Angelina is without Brad, and her 2/3 of her kids are now teenagers, so what’s Angelina’s life like now? Watching your teenagers freak out over the newest tacky hypebeast footwear or YouTuber wedding might make some parents grab a bottle of wine and escape into a Love It or List It marathon. But not Angelina, who says her teens are making her nostalgic for her own teen years.
According to Angelina Jolie, Angelina Jolie ugly cried when dropping tribal elder Maddox Jolie-
Pitt off at college. Angie was at the big Disney D23 Expo doing promotion for The Eternals, but apparently what everybody actually wanted to talk about was her other ongoing and most important project to date, One Mother’s Sacrifice: The Angelina Jolie Story instead. According to Entertainment Tonight, Angie “got a little teary-eyed” when they asked about her, and the rest of her brood’s reaction to 18-year-old Maddox leaving for college at Yonsei University in Seoul, South Korea. While the little ones said their goodbyes in the driveway, Angie escorted Maddox all the way to Seoul, presumably leaving a massive chemtrail of used tissues in her wake.
Kids, they’re such ingrates! You ALLEGEDLY crash one little fuel truck and all of a sudden you’re the bad guy. Us Weekly is reporting that Maddox Jolie-Pitt (now 18) and his pops, William Bradley Pitt, are estranged-er than a motherfucker. To the point where “Maddox doesn’t really see himself as Brad’s son”, according to a source, one who possibly has long, lustrous hair, smells of the jungle after a cooling rain, and has Us Weekly on speed dial.
Now that her divorce with Brad Pitt has moved past the custody phase (I think? Like I don’t want to jinx her), Angelina Jolie is starting the follow-up struggle: recovering her tattered public persona. It’s hard to come out of a malicious divorce without looking like an evil bitch, and considering how many “sources” were popping up to spill some tea, Angie definitely didn’t. But here she is talking about her kids, so how can she be a bitch?
Let’s take bets. Which god-awful mess do you think will run longer – the Trump presidency or Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie’s divorce situation? I’m putting my Keno money down on Brad and Angie. Trump might only have four years to torture us. Think about it… Jennifer Aniston is still managing to find herself on magazine covers, and Brad left her ass over 12 years ago.