Kanye West has followed up his “White Lives Matter“ t-shirt stunt, train wreck interview with Tucker Carlson interview, and his boot from social media over anti-Semitic posts with another brilliant move. Kanye’s showing us how he sexually harassed Adidas executives by making them watch a porn video to prove some kind of point about their business relationship. You know, sometimes theatrics don’t also have to include things that get HR departments involved.
Kanye West Apologized To Kim Kardashian And Shared His Vision For The Future On “Good Morning America”
Despite what we see all around us, we are still technically “pre-apocalypse,” so that disheveled man who looks like he just crawled out from under the scorched remains of the 101 Freeway overpass with a twisted 3-wheeled shopping cart filled with scavenged goods you might have seen on Good Morning America is actually fine. Better than fine in fact, it’s Kanye West as you’ve never seen him before. Kanye sat down with GMA’s Linsey Davis for an exclusive interview in which he shares his vision for the future he is creating for all of us. Don’t worry! He’s got this. Kanye’s plan is actually really good if you’ll just hear him out. All he needs is a minute of your time and your children’s souls. Oh, and can he hold $20? Just for a sec?
Over the weekend, after nine months of trying to keep up with the Kardashians, Pete Davidson finally got winded and gave up. Possibly due to the fact that his now former girlfriend Kim Kardashian’s increasingly smaller frame ceased to provide the necessary draft to boost and maintain his forward momentum. Pete and Kim ended things amicably and their busy schedules were cited as the primary cause for the split. No harm, no foul, right? Well, think again! While Kim’s prospects of winning the Fat Bottom Girls Invitational this year are looking slimmer than ever before, Pete’s met an even worse fate since the breakup. According to Kanye West, Pete “Skete” Davidson has died at the age of 28. Accordingly, tomorrow’s headline will read Dlisted’s Mieka Has Died of Second Hand Embarrassment at the Age of None of Your Damn Business.
In You Cannot Be Serious-News, Kanye West is calling out Adidas over some slides that they released which he says are a blatant copy of his incredibly thoroughly-designed Yeezy slides that look like *checks notes* if LEGO feet were larger.
Kanye West’s Failed Presidential Campaign Claims That It Was Robbed Of Almost $4,000 In Misused Funds After Getting Called Out By The FEC
Kanye West‘s campaign for President of the United States was a flop and ate up millions–$6 million of which was his own–but who cares about that! Except the Federal Election Commission cares. The FEC is apparently after Kanye for some potentially misused funds. The group is still investigating and sent the campaign entity, Kanye 2020, a “Request for Additional Information” regarding three suspicious transactions. Well, Kanye 2020 has an answer, and wouldn’t you know?! They were robbed! They claim three payments to a credit card totaling $3,999 were swindled out from under them.
Kanye “Ye” West has a new album, Donda 2, coming out soon and I find that shocking. I mean, it’s wild that he had time to record a whole album amid all his busy work of stunting with Julia Fox for three minutes and constantly harassing his ex Kim Kardashian, and her new boyfriend, Pete Davidson. But if you want to listen to the next magical masterpiece of musical machinations from a Christian Billionaire Genius, you’re gonna have to buy something called a Stem Player. It costs $200 and looks like an Apple knock-off product found in a swap meet. It was invented by Kanye West so that makes sense.