Cameron Diaz has been out of the game for a while now. In fact her last movie was way back in 2014–her last credit seems to be the reboot of Annie… Which is like, what a way to go out, eh, Cameron?
Well, she’s back, but not in any kind of acting capacity–she’s back in an interview capacity. She talked to InStyle about how she is no longer acting and loves not having to talk to people anymore about acting and can focus on all the other stuff in her life. But that stuff is a secret so she’s telling InStyle how she can’t tell them about it. Get it? But she did tease us, if you think “tease” means ‘basically telling you’–as Cameron let us know that she’s got her eye on the “wellness” market and is thinking of tearing a page out of her pal Gwyneth Paltrow‘s very organized, overpriced book. Is there a Cameron Diaz Goop on the horizon? Probably.
Before all you young tricks were stinking up Saturday afternoon TBS with marathons of How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days and Bring It On, there was a rom-com for those of us cynical tricks who believe there isn’t so much happily ever after as it is happily gay and hag ever after. My Best Friend’s Wedding both warped my expectations of what a writer’s salary can be (Julia, how are you affording that fancy New York lifestyle on a food critic budget?) and made me want to get married just for the sake of having an Aretha Franklin sing-a-long in a lobster restaurant. It’s been 22 years (!!) since the movie came out, and the cast reunited to give the dirty details on how the movie was made…and remind everyone what a salty gay Rupert Everett is!
I guess we can finally answer the burning question as to why Cameron Diaz retired from acting. It’s probably because she was asked to dedicate her life full-time to planning her pal Gwyneth Paltrow’s bachelorette party (and eventual uncoupling ceremony). Gwynny probably has Cam under contract for the next 10-20 years. In case your Goop newsletter somehow ended up in your spam folder, Gwyneth is getting hitched to American Horror Story co-creator Brad Falchuk. According to Page Six, the bride’s pre-wedding festivities are all going down this weekend in Mexico.
Earlier this month, Cameron Diaz’s The Sweetest Thing co-star Selma Blair said that there would never be a sequel to TST because Cameron was officially retired from acting. A day later, she backpedaled on Twitter claiming she was making a joke and that Cameron wasn’t retired from anything. I’m guessing that tweet was sent out after Cameron hit her up with a text that read, “Okay listen, you can be there when it happens, but that’s MY news to break.” Because Cammy recently reunited with her TST co-stars Selma and Christina Applegate for Entertainment Weekly, and she broke the news that she’s retired.
Selma Blair takes it all back! Cameron Diaz is not retiring from acting after all. Well, at least that’s what Selma says. Selma issued a RED ALERT to the public backtracking on her previous comments about her The Sweetest Thing co-star tossing her SAG card into a bonfire. Selma now claims it was all a joke! Here’s Selma’s fevered retraction, as if we can believe anything she says anymore.
??☎️??? BREAKING NEWS ???. Guys please, I was making a joke in an interview. CAMERON DIAZ is NOT retiring from ANYTHING. And for more breaking news: I am NOW retiring from being Cameron Diaz’s spokesperson. ?
— Selma Blair (@SelmaBlair) March 12, 2018
Oof, Selma’s emoji game… Fax machine emoji? Math teacher emoji? In another tweet (since deleted) Selma said (via E! News):
“No no no! It was a quip. Delete. Delete delete. It would only be official if it came from her mouth. Not mine answering a question of sweetest thing part deux was happening. Red alert. not fact.”
According to E!, Cameron hasn’t said anything publicly one way or the other about retiring from acting. She’s only talked about trying to “find herself”. But Selma’s mad scramble backwards up the cliff tells me Cameron’s not so preoccupied with making sure she’s fucking to the right twin to let such a broad statement go unchecked. Cameron probably called Selma up and was like “here’s what you’re gonna do. You’re gonna tweet out a retraction and you’re gonna work in a bad teacher emoji somehow or else there will definitely be no sweetest thing part deux, capiche?! I got back-ends on that bitch”.
Pic: Columbia Pictures
Cameron Diaz’s last big acting year was 2014, where she delivered flop after flop. After that year, she took some time away, and now her The Sweetest Thing co-star Selma Blair is saying she’s fully retired from acting.