Ikea’s new Hůman Cɇntipëdë coffee table delivers itself. – Paylo

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I love this piece…very tongue in cheek. – tim

Pic: Izismile

Lisa Gail!

Almost 4 years ago, a peroxide nightingale flew into our hearts, souls and ears when she showed Rebecca Black what Rebecca Black’s future is going to look like. Some rich housewives spend their time watching court shows as they nibble on Godiva chocolates while their side piece boy toy nibbles on their freshly waxed cooze. Other rich housewives trade in whatever was left of their dignity for basic cable fame by doing a reality shit show. But Lisa Gail, a one-time cosmetology mogul (read: she owned a hair and nail salon) from the Fort Worth suburb of North Richland Hills in Texas, just couldn’t ignore the musical artistry flowing through her Botoxed veins and she made and released a musical anthem about how long it’s okay for your piece to eye fuck another.

Lisa Gail’s “3 Second Rule” came out in 2012, and some of us still have deep scars on our eardrums from her always-on-key Celine Dion-like singing voice and deep scars on our retinas from her “Linda Hogan if Linda Hogan wasn’t a soulless demonic demon from Hell” beauty.

Since then, Lisa Gail’s YouTube Channel has become a treasure trove of brilliance and its probably the sole reason why Tidal hasn’t become the empire Jay-Z’s delusional mind thought it would become. Why pay to subscribe to Tidal when you can get a serving of real musical genius for free by subscribing to the YouTube House of Lisa Gail? Lisa Gail released another hit in 2012 called “Coffee Or Tea,” which went double Reynolds Wrap on the YT charts, and more recently, she has shown us that she has really grown and matured as an artiste.

Lisa Gail has been covering Adele songs and she started with putting her twang on (CAUTION: Clicking on that link will cause you to hyperventilate from the charisma of it all and your ears will squirt out some kind of liquid that’s either blood or jizz) “When We Were Young.” And last week, Lisa Gail burped up her long-awaited cover and video for “Hello“!

In this beautiful video, Lisa Gail gives you the kind of acting you usually only see in a Maury Povich reenactment and vocals you usually only hear at a vet’s office. THIS is artistry:

And I bet that the real Adele is about to say “hello” to early fucking retirement, because what’s the point of staying on the scene when Lisa Gail is here to do her songs better than she ever could?

Pic: @LisaGail8

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Pic: Getty

Right before Easter, Michael brought a true miracle to our attention – Mariah Carey walking on her own! We said praise be, cried, shouted out our devotion and knelt before the true queen of all that is pink, sparkly and of questionable taste. Even more miraculous were the semi-matte shine opaque pantyhose that may or may not have given her the ability to cross the pavement like the goddess she is. Well, now Mimi has blessed us all with even more panty elegance.

The Butterfly Empress instagrammed this adorable snap of her in Sweden. It’s pretty cold up there so that’s probably why she’s wearing a dark semi-sheer hose instead of a nude opaque. And probably why she had to keep her Hello Kitty covered up extra warm with a silky satin pair of demure little undies OVER the pantyhose. Take note, guys, this is how its done. Evening glamour is a subtle flash of leg, cloaked in a mystery topped off with a slightly naughty shimy shammy. I’d also be remiss were I not to mention the elegant gown she’s wearing. It’s the perfect length for anyone who may at any moment take flight to join her pixie fairy sisters in dancing with the butterflies and collecting honey dew drop jewels to then place upon their breasts. The next time someone tells you magic isn’t real, show them this picture. These tights even allowed her to tippy-toe up some stairs! Blessed! All of us, blessed!

Pic: Mariah Carey’s Instagram

“Yeah, my mom and dad are away for like a week. But they’ll be cool. Like, it’s my hair and shit,” probably said Justin Bieber when his friends showed up to see the totally awesome dreads he got. The male version of a Lifetime movie about an out of control teen took to his Instagram to show off his latest *rebellious* style choice. Is it just me or do they look hella fake? Like clip in fake. Like Claire’s Accessories discount section fake.

Always one to prove just how bad ass he is, despite going from making music for toddlers to making music for basic bitches that omg just love to drop molly, the Biebs has stepped his grunge game up with this look. Making it more badass and throwing caution to the wind is the fact that he probably had it done by a fancy hairstylist that charges more than your worldly possessions are worth. Don’t you just love Biebs’s brand of bad boy? Drive to the salon in your expensive lady sportscar, sip an iced tea latte in your designer clothes, talk about how much you love to blunt and smoke blunts, play your hottest track and walk out with a controversial hair style. He’s more Real Housewife at this point than bad bitch. I’m getting serious Erika Girardi/Jayne vibes from his level of style team foolery. In response to his caption on the above picture, “Why”, I’ll just say that it’s too late now to say sorry, you’ve upset all of us. Again.

A photo posted by Justin Bieber (@justinbieber) on Apr 3, 2016 at 2:29am PDT

Pics: Justin Bieber’s Instagram

Do you still have your old issues of Tiger Beat? What? The pages are all stuck together? Why? What did you do to them? Why do you hope your mom doesn’t find them? Ok. Well, you’re acting weird. Anyway, I just wanted to tell you that Paris Hilton‘s ex-boyfriend, Nick Carter, confirmed that the Backstreet Boys are doing a Vegas residency. Stop! Stop screaming! Jesus! Why do you all of a sudden have pigtails and braces?! What is happening?! Get me out of here! Help! Help!

Yep, your inner tween can pop back into her boob tube and smear some definitely not at all toxic body glitter gel on her neck and worst parts of her face because BSB is back. I mean, Backstreet’s back, alright? I’m not going any louder than that. ET spoke to Nick at the L.A. premiere of his new SyFy flick, Dead7 and he told them the band has signed a deal for nine-shows to test the waters and see if a permanent show should get the greenlight. If Carrot Top and Donnie and Marie can have smash amounts of money (copyright Sean Young) shows in Vegas, why wouldn’t BSB? Nick said, “If it does really well, then I think that’ll open that door and then in future we’ll do it. So that’s definitely going to happen but we’re going to do a trial run first.” He also added that fans should expect “a very big and spectacular show“. A couple lasers, some ropes from the ceiling and some outdated choreographed dancing. Yep. Sounds big and spectacular to me.

Kevin Richardson, the tall one with black hair, also confirmed the shows and said it all came about after the boys talked to Britney Spears backstage after one of her lazy lip synch spectaculahs. “It seemed really convenient for the family! A Vegas residency, now that we’re all fathers, could be very convenient for us… We won’t have to travel so much,” said Kevin. He also got your tween heart beating even faster by confirming they’re working on a new album. They should premiere it on Tidal. That would surely save it. Between Britney, JLo, Celine and now BSB, you can live in Vegas and pretend the 90s never ended!

Pic: Wenn