The UK’s second most trustworthy journal of note (after The Daily Mail, of course) The Sun claims that Jennifer Lawrence’s poon has gone from one balding sack of feelings to another! The Sun’s impeccable sources say that 26-year-old JLaw has been down-low doing 47-year-old director Darren Aronfsky, whose mind gave us the ass-to-ass scene in the always-feel-good-movie Requiem For A Dream. So if I was dating Darren, my first question to him would be, “Um, that ass-to-ass thing isn’t something you want to see or partake in, right? Because my greedy b-hole doesn’t like to share.” But maybe that’s just me.

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Despite what that header pic would lead you to believe, it doesn’t look like Leonardo DiCaprio will be in it. That’s too bad. I was hoping we’d get to see the Planeteers side-eye Captain Planet when they realize he spends about 75% of the year on a yacht.

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Buffalo Jill – Paylo

Upvote winner:

“The Sybil fall collection is beautiful, no it’s not, yes it is, no it’s not, yes it is” – Whamo

Pic: uberHumor

Miss Coco Puffz, the Instagram model of all Instagram models!

That over-the-shoulder “catch this charisma” pose… That lens-melting eye contact with the camera… That CoCo-approved booty pop…. The way she’s showing off every piece of FASHION she’s working….. Now THAT is modeling from your head to your paws, which is something that the likes of Kendull Jenner, the Hadids and Cara Delawhatever could never even think of doing.

Phoebe Price will always be the Pose Queen of the Pumpkin Patch, but Coco Puffz is now the Pose Princess of the Pumpkin Patch. Twitter user Victoria Aycock was at Mr. Bones Pumpkin Patch in Culver City, CA with her family when she nearly stopped, dropped and rolled over Coco Puffz burning up the place with her piping hot modeling skills. (Side note: Why can’t my last name be “Aycock“? “It should be since you are ay cock.” – you) Victoria tweeted a pic of Coco Puffz’s glamour shoot and so far, it’s gotten over a hundred thousand likes.

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Pic: Getty

While dressed up in Lumineers cosplay, Justin Timberlake went to the premiere of Jessica Biel’s movie. I have to give them points for coordinating their looks. I mean, Justin’s facial expression says, “I just made a wet poopy in my diaper,” and Jessica’s dress looks like it was made out of baby diarrhea leather – Lainey Gossip

If you’ve been looking for a last-minute Halloween costume that will bring the nostalgia and sexiness, take a tip from Misty Copeland and dress up like a slutty leg lamp from A Christmas Story – Drunken Stepfather

So in other words, Kylie Jenner has had a nose job, butt implants, breast implants & more – Celebitchy

Maksim Chmerkovskiy is done with Dancing with the Has-Beens – Reality Tea

Reason #9,999,999,999,999,999,9999 for why Dolly Parton is a gift to us all – OMG Blog

Shep Smith sort of kind of came out of the glass closet to defend Ole’ Raw Hamburger Huevos – Towleroad

200 people walked out of Amy Schumer’s show in Tampa after she started Trump bashing. Errr, if you go to an Amy Schumer show, you should 100% expect her to get into some Trump bashing and you shouldn’t be shocked when she does. That’s like me walking away from a glory hole after a dude sticks his dick through it – The Superficial 

I hate Amber Tamblyn now. She ruined I Wanna Sex You Up for me – Pajiba

Why do I want to hang all of my keys on Victoria Justice’s dress? – Popoholic

In case you didn’t already know, running up behind a horse will probably lead to you needing a CT scan – Hollywood Tuna 

A rainforest charity has called out Leonardo DiCatchAHo as a faux environmentalist and told him to step down from his UN position – WWTDD

For a quick second, I thought that Tina Yothers had gone back to blond – The Nip Slip 

Here’s Mrs. Rojo Caliente as Nancy Reagan – SOW

RIGGED! You know that a Price Is Right production assistant is in the back stopping that wheel. You can’t fool me, Drew Carey!  Just Jared

Swoooooon – Popsugar

Pic: Wenn.com