Things have escalated quickly in the surprise Robin Thicke and Paula Patton custody battle.

Marvin Gaye fan, Robin, rolled up on his ex-wife’s home yesterday morning, accompanied by the L.A. county sheriff’s deputies. He was also clutching a court order in his ass-prospectin’ hand that said he could have time with his 6-year-old son, Julian. The cops went in, and TMZ reports that Julian told them he didn’t want to go with dad because he was scared of him. The deputies came out and told Robin they weren’t going to take Julian against his will.

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Pretty Poison!

Catch Me (I’m Falling) isn’t only the name of a musical masterpiece from 1987, it’s also the words you probably screamed after you inhaled the giant cloud of AquaNet (pink can) fumes wafting off of that picture and were completely knocked over from the intense glamour of it all. Every time I listen to Catch Me (I’m Falling), which is a lot, I can feel my hair tease itself and my shoulders start to shimmy on their own. Philadelphia’s own Pretty Poison is still together and the group is made up of Peg Bundy’s style icon Jade Starling (who is also a gay-rights activist), Kaya Pryor and Whey Cooler (which is a great name for a new wave drag queen as well as a great name for a refreshing protein supplement drink).

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LL Cool J (49)
Grant Gustin (27)
Emma Greenwell (28)
Frankie Sandford (28)
Mikalah Gordon (29)
Caleb Followill (35)
Zach Gilford (35)
Angela Lindvall (38)
Karen Elson (38)
Kevin Durand (43)
Jason Bateman (48)
Dave Grohl (48)
Emily Watson (50)
Zakk Wylde (50)
Dan Schneider (51)
Slick Rick (52)
Mark Addy (53)
Shepard Smith (53)
Jim Duggan (63)
Evelyn Braxton (69)
T-Bone Burnett (69)
Carl Weathers (69)
Holland Taylor (74)
Faye Dunaway (76)
Trevor Nunn (77)
Jack Jones (79)

Pic: Underneathestarz

Some people have just discovered that Blake NotSoLively says she’s part Cherokee in L’Oréal ads and I wish everyone would shut up about it before a dumb Hollywood executive gets ideas and casts her in a Sacagawea biopic – Lainey Gossip

This may be a bit embarrassing for you, but Maitland Ward is wearing the exact same outfit you wore to work today – (NSFW) Drunken Stepfather 

FYI: Marie Osmond is not performing at the inauguration, but honestly if she did, she’d be the biggest star there – Celebitchy

Okay, but what is that animatronic cat doing? Is she putting dandruff on her ass or ass dust on her hair? – The Superficial

Will that Nicola Peltz person please wear a lighter colored top next time so that we can get a better look at her dog, the true star of the picture? – Popoholic

Mimi Imfurst is truly first when it comes to American drag queens performing in Cuba – Towleroad

Pro tip of the day: Unless you’re Shelley Long’s Outrageous Fortune character, jumping from subway platform to subway platform is a really fucking dumb idea – Hollywood Tuna

And I thought Fix-A-Flat asses were beyond nightmare inducing – OMG Blog

Twice this week  (the first time was at the Golden Globes) I’ve been reminded that Sylvester Stallone named one of his daughters Sistine – IDLYITW

Those of you who screamed out a million YAAASSSes over Donald Glover playing Lando Calrissian may have second thoughts after finding out that Atlanta has been pushed to 2018 because of Star Wars  – Pajiba

Lamar Odom is obviously not 100% okay yet, because he’s saying crazy shit like how he wants Khlozilla back – Starcasm

A Living Single reboot may happen – Jezebel

Steve Harvey met with Donald Trump to discuss working with Ben Carson on housing issues. I was going to say that Trump is going to meet with Jerry Springer next, but Springer is actually qualified for a political position so that’s not going to happen – Just Jared

Billy Elliot is getting married to Kate Mara – Popsugar

Jaden Smith went full Jaden Smith after failing his driving test and he had a “meltdown” in the DMV parking lot. Oh please, Jaden shouldn’t feel so special. Who hasn’t had a meltdown in the DMV parking lot? – Metro UK

Pic: L’Oréal

I’m just going to tell you right now that this post is not going to end with you having to throw out a “RIP” to those dude’s eyeballs because his pussy clawed them out. Weird, I know.

Weston (the black pussy above) and his sister Ellinore are known as the Adventure Cats and they have a Facebook page devoted to all of the outdoorsy stuff they like to get into. They climb trees! They hike! And they even get into snow sports. Weston’s humans recently uploaded a video of him riding bareback on one of them while going sledding. It wasn’t the first time that Weston has ridden a human snow mobile and according to his humans, that cold-loving pussy loves to shred. Hmmmm….

Weston does look calm, oddly, but unless you want to find yourself searching the snow for your face after your cat rips it off, I wouldn’t try that mess at home. And I know what’s really going on here. Weston isn’t having fun. Weston is working. He’s training his human to carry him. Because when the cat vs. dog war finally happens and cats enslave all of us humans (I can’t wait for that day), they’re going to need us to carry them through the snow during battle. Duh!

The day that we never thought would come has finally come. Johnny Depp and Amber Heard are finally going to be divorced. We were teased with this same news five months ago, but TMZ says it’s for real this time. A judge has reportedly made their divorce final. I know strange things are supposed to happen on Friday the 13th, but I wasn’t expecting this.

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