Category: Top Gun
Open Post: Hosted By The New “Top Gun: Maverick” Recruits
As if we needed more proof that Top Gun 2: Bottoms Up is anything more than a very expensive video of Tom Cruise fapping into the wind, the film’s director, Joseph Kosinski, was interviewed for Entertainment Weekly and detailed the staggering lengths the production went to in order to make Tom feel good about himself. EW also revealed some new sepia toned cast photos which I guess are supposed to evoke feelings of nostalgia but really just expose the fact that the production of Top Gun 2: Rear Viewz has depleted the world’s supply of bronzer.
The First Full Trailer For “Top Gun: Maverick” Is Here
Tom Cruise proves just how flexible he is in the latest trailer for Top Gun 2: The Ego Has Landed with an impressive display of autofellacio. As with the teaser trailer we got back in July, this new trailer is all about how rad Tom Cruise is. He’s not just a maverick flying by the seat of his stunt butt, he’s THE Maverick. Top Gun 2: Cockpit Tease features Tom engaging in various acts of speed while a voice-over blows smoke up his ass. Guys, his exploits…………(wait for it)………..(wait for it)………(I hope you went to the bathroom first because)…… (wait for it)……….(almost there)……. (here it comes)……….(almost there)……are legendary.
Kelly McGillis Wasn’t Asked To Be In “Top Gun 2: Maverick” But Thinks She’s Too Old And Fat Anyway
I doubt anybody will be surprised to learn that 62-year-old Kelly McGillis will not be having steamy, curtain billowing, silhouette sex with Tom Cruise in the upcoming Top Gun 2: The Legend Of Maverick’s Lifts. But can you believe they never even asked her to participate? I mean, yes, it’s not surprising, but it is exceedingly rude. Good thing Kelly has neither the time nor the inclination to get anywhere near the danger zone again.
Here’s The Teaser Trailer For “Top Gun: Maverick” For Those With A Need For Speed
Even though it’s not going to be released for another year, a teaser trailer for Top Gun 2: Bottoms Up has landed. If I didn’t know any better I’d say they just cobbled together scenes from the original movie and slapped that old age filter over Tom Cruise’s face, because there is absolutely nothing new to see here. But the fleeting glance of Jon Hamm STRIDING WITH PURPOSE tells me they actually filmed some new scenes. But the rest is all been there, done that, got the soundtrack to prove it (seriously, it’s one of the best motion picture soundtracks of the 80s). Shirtless beach volleyball scene: Check. Tommy racing the wind on his motorcycle: Check. Drunken group singing: Check. Pointless insubordination: Check, check, and check.
Former Disney Star David Henrie Got Arrested For Bringing A Loaded Gun To LAX
Ever have a little trip planned and hastily pack a bag for a fun weekend getaway, but forget rule number one of air travel and pack a brand new 8 oz bottle of Aveeno unscented lotion in your carry-on which you watch, with tears in your eyes, as TSA cruelly throws it away? Well I have and it’s sad! Imagine doing the same only instead of lotion, you absentmindedly toss a loaded handgun in your luggage. That’s what happened to Wizards of Waverly Place star David Henrie. Only instead of being out 8 bucks and spending the weekend ashy as fuck, David had to go to jail.
You’ll Have To Wait Until Summer 2020 For “Top Gun: Maverick”
Apparently the highway to the danger zone is moving slower than Monday morning rush hour traffic and will take a whole lot longer than planned to get everyone to their final destination. According to Deadline, the release of Top Gun: Maverick has been moved a year.
The decades-later sequel to 1986’s Top Gun, was scheduled to hit theaters on July 12, 2019, but Paramount has switched the release to June 26, 2020. Is it because the wardrobe department needs more time to figure out how to construct a flight suit harness that will hold in Jon Hamm? Are the writers having a difficult time trying to explain how Goose and Carole made such a douchey son? None of the above, actually. Sources tell Deadline that Paramount has extended production time in order to perfect the complex flight sequences, so the movie can “be great.”
Meanwhile, Val Kilmer was spotted taking a break from filming to have lunch with his daughter.
Val Kilmer Steps Out Looking Healthy While Preparing to Film Top Gun 2 After Battle with Cancer https://t.co/jwjugDSam8
— People (@people) August 30, 2018
People magazine describes Val as “looking healthy” while out with his daughter, which I would agree. Val needs to be as healthy as possible before he starts shooting Top Gun: Maverick, and that involves all types of health, like mental strength. Val’s can’t show any hesitation in the event Tom Cruise approaches him during a break and starts talking about religion. “I see you’re a Christian Scientist. Isn’t it so crazy how close Scientist sounds to Scientology? Here, let me give you a pamphlet.”
Pic: Wenn.com