Tom Cruise’s Butt Exposes Itself To Scrutiny

August 24, 2017 / Posted by:

An eagle-eyed butt connoisseur was watching Tom Cruise in Valkyrie and noticed that the star’s ass looked suspiciously juicy. He screen captured the image and #tooktotwitter to posit a theory that the diminutive actor wears a fake butt.

Page Six has the story:

Tom Cruise’s derriere is causing quite the stir on Twitter. A fan who recently rewatched the actor’s 2008 film Valkyrie noticed that his butt in one particular scene looks comparatively larger than it does in other scenes throughout the rest of the movie. He tweeted a picture of Cruise’s backside that soon went viral and really got the debate started.

Here’s the tweet and a picture of the juicy ass in question:

And here it is in motion. Tom’s butt happens at the 4:45 mark.

That really is some prime bubble butt! But, as many people posited, it’s most likely a “stunt butt.” They are common in the film industry and give performers extra padding when doing stunt work. Given that Tom famously does most of his own stunts, it’s a totally legitimate explanation, but also the most boring. However, I looked up “stunt butt” on the internet and Urban Dictionary had a more stimulating definition:

Similar to that of a stunt double, a stunt butt is someone who replaces a male porn star when the pounding becomes too intense or a fuck stunt may be too dangerous for the star butt.

So, the internet is totally in agreement that Tom Cruise has a stunt butt! I don’t believe it though. Tom does his own stunts, everybody knows this! Another possible definition of “stunt butt” might be the type of leaky badonk you might find on Love & Hip Hop. That is also an interesting theory. Tom is well known for wearing lifts and it’s been suggested that he’s not averse to injections either. Tom’s shady director isn’t in a rush to clarify the situation either.

Christopher McQuarrie, the director of the film, caught wind of the debate and said he wouldn’t give an answer. “At 12k retweets and climbing, why would I ever add clarity to this thread? #Valkyrie.” McQuarrie’s tweet has since been deleted, and his rep declined to comment when reached by Page Six.

So, the mystery of Tom’s swole ass cheeks will remain up to the viewer’s interpretation. Personally, I think he wears it all the time for protection, just in case he bumps into Leah Remini and she decides to kick his diabolical ass up and down Sunset Blvd.


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