Jon Hamm Will Squeeze The Hammaconda Into A “Top Gun” Flight Suit

August 23, 2018 / Posted by:

As if the addition of Miles Teller didn’t add enough douche bro fumes to the upcoming reboot of Top Gun, the ghost of Jon Hamm’s fraternity hazing past will also be haunting the set. Deadline reports that in addition to Jon, Ed Harris, and Lewis Pullman (son of MY president Bill Pullman), will also be joining the cast of Top Gun 2: Look Who’s Topping.

So far, Jennifer Connelly is the only female lead to join the cast. To recap, Top Gun 2: No Girls Allowed will star Tom Cruise, Val Kilmer, Miles, Glen Powell, and now Ed, Lewis, and Jon. If the casting director doesn’t slow their roll, they’re going to exhaust Hollywood’s supply of white dudes! To be fair, it looks like the supporting cast will add to the film’s diversity.

The trio joins a supporting group that Deadline told you about yesterday that includes Charles Parnell, Jay Ellis, Bashir Salahuddin, Danny Ramirez and Monica Barbaro.

Three of those actors are black, one is named Ramirez, and the other has a vagina. Just like in the real world!

We still don’t know much about the plot yet, but I guess it doesn’t really matter. All we know is that Tom’s character Maverick will now be a flight instructor at the Top Gun Academy (aka Sky Org) where he takes Goose’s son (Miles) under his wing. Will there be steamy sheets and linens animated by industrial fans? Probably. Will there be a reprisal of the beach volleyball scene only instead of beach volleyball they’re playing touch football to a slowed down, minor key cover of Playing With The Boys sung by Ariana Grande? Probably. Will I still go see Top Gun 2: Speed 2: Cruise Control? Probably. What can I say? I saw the original when I was in 8th grade and Val Kilmer’s greasy chest meat made me absolutely sure that I would let a boy touch my boobies one day. And it they can’t find an XXL flight suit to accommodate all of The Hammaconda? All the more reason.


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