There was a time when the saddest thing news I could imagine about Dog the Bounty Hunter’s fifth wife Beth Chapman might be that she dyed her I Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter-colored hair a bland boxed dye brown. Today we have actual, legitimate sad news pertaining to Beth. TMZ reports that Beth’s health has taken a turn, and she’s currently in a medically-induced coma.
Keep your comforting warm gummy bears handy, because this story is a 100% pallet sized case of Cameron Frye-sized sads. Edie McClurg of Ferris Bueller’s Day Off and the best television show of our generation Small Wonder, is reportedly suffering from dementia at the age of 67. Edie’s family is currently taking action to help protect the icon (yes, she is) and are in the process of acquiring conservatorship. This story gets a bit sadder, so pick your favorite color and pop that pocket warmed gummy bear in your mouth right about now.
The optimist in me was confident that we’d close out 2018 without any more stories featuring Heather Locklear, the authorities, phone calls to 911, and stressed-out family members. It seemed as though Heather was getting help and on her way to doing better. But TMZ that Heather has been put on a psychiatric hold after her therapist and lawyer realized she needed some serious help. Heather was reportedly at her home on Sunday when someone (it’s not known who) called 911 and paramedics showed up.
Apparently there’s a Sliding Doors-style alternate universe in which Scary Spice is the one that doesn’t come back for a reunion tour. In Mel B’s memoir Brutally Honest, which comes out next week, she says that she once swallowed 200 pills in an attempt to leave her marriage to Stephen Belafonte.
The wildfires currently raging through California have been devastating, despite their cute-sounding names (Camp Fire in the north, which has me picturing teenagers singing Kumbaya in a circle, and Woolsey Fire in the south, which makes me picture the same thing but with more blankets and sweaters). The fires have proven that fire doesn’t care who you are, it’s going to rip through your house and leave a pile of ashes. It was previously reported that the fires claimed Caitlyn Jenner’s house, but that was wrong info. Caitlyn’s house still stands, but many others weren’t so lucky.
Heather Locklear has been going through it, y’all, and it is breaking my gay heart. Unfortunately, for the 90s’ most important blond bad girl (pictured above in her latest mugshot), the trouble is not over. Continue reading