Category: Roseanne Barr

Wanda Sykes Showed Scott Baio Who’s Really In Charge

May 28, 2020 / Posted by:

As if our current political discourse wasn’t ridiculous enough as it is, alleged tiny dick haver and Donald Trump superfan Scott Baio has entered the chat. Last week, presumptive Democratic presidential nominee Joe Biden got his gaffe on when his appearance on The Breakfast Club ended with him saying “you ain’t black” [if you vote for Trump]. At the time, Wanda Sykes, comedian and former producer/writer for the revival of Roseanne, defended Joe’s remarks on Twitter, saying that it was a (bad) joke and at least “he didn’t say 2 go shoot Clorox in our tits.” Scott, presumably still smarting from having recently injected Clorox in his tits, took offense. Scott thought he was back in charge of something and tried to let Wanda know what time it was. Lo and behold, he must have one of those sex watches like Drake has, because he was spot on! It absolutely was Wanda’s Foot Up His Ass-O’Clock.

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Roseanne Barr Believes That Coronavirus Is A Ploy To Get Rid Of Boomers 

April 7, 2020 / Posted by:

Roseanne Barr has always brought the messiness, and just because she’s stuck in her home, doesn’t mean she can’t bring her signature messiness to your home. Norm Macdonald is doing a YouTube series Quarantined With Norm Macdonald, and Roseanne was a guest and kept her tinfoil hat on tight as she told us that she believes coronavirus is all part of a scheme to take out old rich people. Okay, RICH Boomer…

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Roseanne Is Going On Tour With Andrew Dice Clay

June 24, 2019 / Posted by:

It’s been a minute or two since we checked in on career bridge arsonist Roseanne Barr. Unsurprisingly, things were still a mess in Roseanne’s neck of the woods. She had accused Sara Gilbert of killing her career (I didn’t realize Sara Gilbert’s Twitter handle was @therealroseanne). She was also complaining that she can’t use the f-word. Well, it looks like Roseanne found the sweet spot in the middle of the Venn diagram of people who have no problem saying offensive stuff, and people who still pick up the phone when they see her number on the call display, and apparently it’s Andrew Dice Clay.

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Roseanne Barr Claims She’s Queer And Is Mad She Can’t Use The F-Word

April 22, 2019 / Posted by:

Roseanne Barr claims that not only did she put the bomp in the bomp bah bomp bah bomp, she also put the Q in LGBTQ. And while the jury is still out on who put the ram in the rama lama ding dong, Roseanne is definitely responsible for putting the long, heavy sigh in my “this bitch again?”. Roseanne put down the live fish she’d been chomping on and popped her head out from under her bridge to complain about not being able to use the word “fag” in public. In a video titled “The word ‘fag’ is h8ful-I put the Q in LGBTQ”, Roseanne questioned why she can’t use the word, in public at least, especially considering she’s “as queer as two mother fuckers”. I’m sorry, qwat?

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Roseanne Barr Blames Sara Gilbert For Ruining Her Life And Career

March 22, 2019 / Posted by:

Roseanne Barr knows better than anyone that nobody can hurt you as deeply as your own pretend family. In an interview with The Washington Post (why tho?), Roseanne accused her pretend daughter, Sara Gilbert, of ruining her career and destroying her life. I know, I know! I too thought thought Ambien had ruined Roseanne’s career. I guess the good folks at Sanofi-Aventis will sleep soundly tonight knowing they no longer have the blood of Roseanne’s mangled career on their hands.

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