Category: Grace Jones

Grace Jones Quit “Bond 25” Within First Few Minutes Of Work Because She Didn’t Have A Big Enough Role

July 1, 2019 / Posted by:

Grace Jones played May Day in A View To A Kill and so people in production were super ex$ited to have her back for a Bond movie because of all the no$talgia. Well unfortunately you’ll just have to watch one of those HD re-releases of A View To A Kill if you wanna see Grace in a James Bond movie, because she is not coming back after all. At least it seems that way since it’s being reported that she literally walked off set just a few moments after getting there, because she thought her role was too small. Have you seen a James Bond movie? The women just get drowned in oil, painted gold, shot in the head while tied up, or stabbed in the chest by Halle Berry.

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Open Post: Hosted By Grace Jones Shutting Down Zendaya’s Tommy Hilfiger Show

March 3, 2019 / Posted by:

Set fire to the reign, Grace Jones! Zendaya has a line for Tommy Hilfiger and her show during Paris Fashion Week featured a homage to the seminal 1973 “Battle of Versailles” show which mainly featured models of color en masse for the first time. Zendaya’s show featured veteran black supermodels Beverly Johnson and Pat Cleveland, vitiligo activist/model Winnie Harlow, some actual plus-sized models (a first for Hilfiger) and 70-year-old GRACE JONES! Zendaya’s obviously ok with a step to the side because she let GRACE JONES walk her runway.

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Open Post: Hosted By Grace Jones Bringing The Glamour Even While She’s Trapped In A Goth Shrub

October 26, 2017 / Posted by:

Nothing can stop the legendary goddess of everything Grace Jones from demonstrating her top-tier pose game and slathering a red carpet with her glamour. I mean, a cunty Emo hedge attacked Grace Jones’ head last night, and not even that kept her down.

A must-see highly educational film on how we should all live our lives (aka the Grace Jones documentary Grace Jones: Bloodlight and Bami) premiered in London last night, and the empress herself glided onto the carpet in a headpiece that looks like it came from Hot Topic’s capsule collection for Armstrong Garden Center (Hot Topic x Armstrong Garden Center). It was really made by Philip Treacy.  There’s that saying, “Bitch could wear a potato sack and still look hot.” Well, Grace Jones can wear Home Depot’s entire shrubbery section on her head and still look hotter than hot.

I would never advise us peons to try to work a look that Grace Jones has already worked to perfection, but well, if you’re invited to a glamorous funeral and a duck hunting expedition on the same day, this may be the look for you!



Open Post: Hosted By Grace Jones At Your Funeral

September 8, 2017 / Posted by:

When you’re a naive 9-year-old and you’re jammin’ in your jammies to “Pull Up To The Bumper” by the legendary Grace Jones, you might not realize until, I don’t know, 15-20 years later, that that song is HELLA dirty. And then you’re all like, “Oh snap, bumper…doesn’t mean like car bumper and the big black limousine is… Oh no she didn’t!” Well, it’s Grace Jones so of course she did. Now I finally figured out what “PUTTB” is about, but all these years later I’m still scratching my head over “Nipple to the Bottle.” But it really doesn’t matter. I’m happy to just jam in my jammies while Grace gives me life.

Grace, who is 69 (69! Your memaw could never) was at the TIFF premiere of the documentary about herself called Grace Jones: Bloodlight and Bami yesterday. She showed up looking like she just put her third billionaire husband in the ground and had to hurry up about it because she had another party immediately following the reading of the will. And yes, in this scenario, she got EVERYTHING, naturally.

Nobody, I mean NO. BOD. Y. gives face like Grace, and she’s serving it up to you on a silver platter held by her own personal coke valet. This bitch is iconic.



One Direction Allegedly Got Grace Jones Kicked Off The Jonathan Ross Show

November 21, 2015 / Posted by:

Okay, now before you go and start researching new planets to live on (since a world in which intergalactic goddess Grace Jones is shown anything less than enthusiastic worship is clearly doomed), let’s just keep in mind that this story is courtesy of The Sun. So let’s just say you should probably grab a couple grains of salt before you grab the number of a real estate on Blorg 6.

According to The Sun (via OK!), singing hipster elves One Direction recently got Grace Jones ejected from an appearance on The Jonathan Ross Show. The episode, which was taped earlier in the week and scheduled to air this evening, was supposed to feature 1D and Grace together. But a source claims they were afraid Grace would “overshadow” their appearance (true), so they had her name crossed off the call sheet.

Grace was apparently super pissed when she found out, because she traveled from Jamaica to London specifically for the taping, and that “it showed a complete lack of respect from young guys.” To make up for it, the source says Grace Jones was offered an appearance on Alan Carr: Chatty Man.

Of course, a spokesperson for One Direction is side-eyeing The Sun’s story and told OK! that 1D had nothing to do with Grace being cut from the show, adding that “it wasn’t even discussed with them.” Okay, but if they really wanted to avoid karmic retribution from the ageless icon gods, their publicist should have added: “…in fact, they’re incredibly bummed out that some tacky jerk would deny them the privilege of sharing a seat on that yellow sofa with THE Grace Jones. Yes, even Zayn Malik is sad. He’s not even in the band anymore, and he’s sad too.

Here are the people who are currently holding the No. 1 spot on Grace Jones’ shit list (and possible recipients of a future read) during a sound check and performance for Jimmy Kimmel Live! in Los Angeles last night.

Pics: The Jonathan Ross Show,

Grace Jones Is Talking Shit About Lady Gaga Again

October 6, 2015 / Posted by:

I really, really hope that Grace Jones’Reading These Hos Tour” never ever ends, because her beautiful words wrapped in pure bitchiness never fail to take me up, up and away and when I read her interviews I know how Jesus’ apostles felt when he spoke to them. In her memoirs, I Will Never Write My Memoirs, Grace Jones lines up many pop trick of today and slaps them down for copying her. While promoting her memoirs, Grace also slapped down Kanye West for jacking ideas from her and said that he’ll get a face full of her if they ever cross paths. Well, now it’s Lady CaCa’s turn to feel the wrath of Grace again.

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