Open Post: Hosted By Grace Jones At Your Funeral

September 8, 2017 / Posted by:

When you’re a naive 9-year-old and you’re jammin’ in your jammies to “Pull Up To The Bumper” by the legendary Grace Jones, you might not realize until, I don’t know, 15-20 years later, that that song is HELLA dirty. And then you’re all like, “Oh snap, bumper…doesn’t mean like car bumper and the big black limousine is… Oh no she didn’t!” Well, it’s Grace Jones so of course she did. Now I finally figured out what “PUTTB” is about, but all these years later I’m still scratching my head over “Nipple to the Bottle.” But it really doesn’t matter. I’m happy to just jam in my jammies while Grace gives me life.

Grace, who is 69 (69! Your memaw could never) was at the TIFF premiere of the documentary about herself called Grace Jones: Bloodlight and Bami yesterday. She showed up looking like she just put her third billionaire husband in the ground and had to hurry up about it because she had another party immediately following the reading of the will. And yes, in this scenario, she got EVERYTHING, naturally.

Nobody, I mean NO. BOD. Y. gives face like Grace, and she’s serving it up to you on a silver platter held by her own personal coke valet. This bitch is iconic.


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