Category: Farts & Queefs

Open Post: Hosted By Gwyneth Paltrow Saying That Rectal Ozone Therapy Is The Weirdest Wellness Thing She’s Done

March 14, 2023 / Posted by:

Since starting Goop in 2008, Gwyneth Paltrow aimed to share ways to “nourish the inner aspect” through unconventional and expensive wellness fads and lifestyle items with other wildly pretentious people, and also to turn a profit, obviously. So, she’s tried a lot of things over the years, but while guesting on The Art of Being Well, she shared that the strangest wellness thing she’s ever tried is rectal ozone therapy, which is when ozone gas is pumped right into your fart-box. Though the FDA warns against it, Gwyneth (and others who also aren’t qualified to give medical advice) claim it has many benefits.

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Prince Andrew’s Settlement Payment To Virginia Giuffre Was Smaller Than Originally Reported

August 8, 2022 / Posted by:

The only silver lining to have come out of Prince Andrew essentially getting away with murder (ing the last veneer of respectability for the Royal Family), was that at least he was broke, or so we thought, after having paid a reported $12 dollar settlement to make all that sex trafficking bother with his former mate Jeffrey Epstein disappear. However, The Sun reports that Andrew’s mum THE QUEEN probably didn’t have to sell jars of her Royal farts on the internet to help cover his payment to his accuser, Virginia Giuffre, because sources are now saying that Andrew only had to pay $3.5 to $6 million to settle the lawsuit in which Virginia accused him of sexually abusing her when she was 17. The Sun says that Andrew is so not broke in fact, he and Original Fergie just bought a $6 million house in the “posh” Mayfair district in London. So I guess Liz was just selling her farts for Love of God and County. God may save the queen, but THE QUEEN saves her queefs for The People.

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Miriam Margolyes Accuses Arnold Schwarzenegger Of Purposely Farting In Her Face

July 19, 2022 / Posted by:

NME reports that, during a recent appearance on the “I’ve Got News for You” podcast, British-Australian acting legend Miriam Margolyes shared a very interesting story about working with Arnold Schwarzenegger on the 1999 action movie End of Days. Arnold played an ex-cop who tries to stop Satan from spreading his seed, and Miriam played Satan’s evil sister. In the film (11% on Rotten Tomatoes, by the way), Arnold and Miriam have a knock-down, drag-out fight scene. 81-year-old Miriam says that while they were filming, Arnie farted in her face while she was lying on the floor and “couldn’t escape.” Well, that sucks, but accidents happen, right? Nope! Miriam says, “he did it deliberately, right in my face.” Whoa, that’s a low blow!

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