Millennials Are Risking Death By Eating Avocados In States Where They’ve Been Recalled!
Nothing comes between millennials and their avocado toast – even the morgue, dammit! We all know that the REAL reason none of us own a house is because of $8 avocado toast and $5 lattes (forget about the crippling student loan debt!), and apparently the dedication is driving people to eat the green stuff even when it poses a fatal risk to one’s health. Despite an avocado recall in six states, millennials are sticking to eating the stuff. Don’t you feel in awe of the future leaders of the world?!
Dlisted: The Podcast, Episode 41 – Oh, Just A Story Nobody’s Heard About
At the top of this episode, Allison and I deliver some truly BREAKING NEWS by getting into the saga of the college admissions scandal, because it’s not like we’re a week late on that. But we mostly talk about the scandal’s breakout star Olivia Jade. Then we take a sharp left onto Anti-Vaxx Blvd. by talking about Kat Von D denying she’s an anti-vaxxer and anti-semitic. We also get into the life-saving elixir that is Taco Bell hot sauce, Tan France’s pronunciation of “squirrel,” Bella Thorne washing her hair with beer, MySpace losing all the music, and the magic of blue protective film.
We end with the “Which Sesame Street character would you want to be stuck on a deserted island with?” mess, and yes, it brings out Sesame Street sex jokes.
You can find us on iTunes, Stitcher, TuneIn, Spotify, and Google Play. And if you’ve got any ideas, tips or need advice, e-mail us at: [email protected].
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Hot Slut Of The Day!
The A/C thieving koala!
A winemaker named Tim Whitrow said on Facebook that on Monday afternoon, he made a stop at the the New Alluca Wine Vineyard in the South of Australia to check on his grapes. It’s autumn in Australia, but parts have been hit with a heatwave, so it’s hotter than a theater queen’s bussy when Hugh Jackman thrusts while yodeling out a show tune. Tim had his dog with him, so he did the non-rich person version of Tesla’s dog mode by leaving the AC on with the door open so his pooch could come and go as she pleased. Never mind that my mom (who threatened to have us arrested if we so much as thought about rolling down the window with the AC on) would pass out from the wasteful thought of AC air blowing outside, Tim came back to his car to find an adorable furry trespasser in it.
People Think Kim Kardashian Is Stealing Naomi Campbell’s Looks
I mean, she stole the Titanic’s ass, so is this much of a shock? Sartorial sleuths who have kept a National Archives-level documentation of everything Naomi Campbell has worn, noticed recently that Kim Kardashian seems to be making a point of showing up in frocks Naomi once strutted down the runway. It’s not exactly like the Kardashians are known for setting trends beyond making everyone want to get paid to do nothing, but I guess trying to snatch Naomi’s style is the straw that broke the fashion camel’s back.
Dlisted: The Podcast, Episode 40 – Bloody Maaaaaaaary
Allison and I touched on Bloody Mary a bit in the last episode, and in this one, we get it into it more at the top. We throw down a CliffsNotes history of Bloody Mary, and I explain why I think we threw water on the mirror while trying to summon her (and no, not because the water company were in on it and wanted our bills to be higher). We move on from Bloody Mary to Classy JLo’s demure engagement ring, Jose Canseco’s obsession with A-Rod, Goopy Paltrow being Goopy Paltrow, and Aaron Carter’s defense of Michael Jackson.
We also get into Ariana Grande pissing off vegans, Heidi Montag letting us know she’s got a PhD in diversity, Duchess Meghan saying she doesn’t read Twitter, Kristen Bell and Dax Shepherd sharing another gross tidbit about their love, and the pineapple pulling phenomenon. We end by answering listener questions about an ASMR-addicted co-worker and how to explain porny pics to your kid. Basically, we answer questions we have no business answering.
You can find us on iTunes, Stitcher, TuneIn, Spotify, and Google Play. And if you’ve got any ideas, tips or need advice, e-mail us at: [email protected].
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Alfonso Ribeiro Dropped His Lawsuit Against “Fortnite” About The Carlton Dance
Former high-hopes-having Alfonso Ribeiro has dropped his lawsuit against Epic Games, makers of “Fortnite”. Alfonso was suing Epic for allegedly ripping off his Fresh Prince of Bel-Air’s character’s trademark dance move – “The Carlton” – for a downloadable “emote” for player characters in the game. It’s not easy to copyright a series of physical movements from an almost 30-year-old sitcom so Alfonso is out that “Fortnite” check. No worries, though. It’s 2019 so they’ll probably re-boot Fresh Prince in a couple of minutes so just hang in there, ‘Fonso.