Sam Clafin (30)
Lauren Jauregui of Fifth Harmony (19)
Cece Fry (25)
Alanna Masterson (28)
Ed Westwick (29)
Drake Bell (30)
Antoine Dodson (30)
Khloe Kardashian (32)
Bianca Del Rio (41)
Tobey Maguire (41)
Christian Kane (42)
Jo Frost (45)
Draco Rosa (46)
Ravi Kapoor (47)
Viktor Petrenko (47)
J.J. Abrams (50)
Michael Ball (54)
Tony Leung (54)
Lorrie Morgan (57)
Ted Haggard (60)
Isabelle Adjani (61)
Julia Duffy (65)
Vera Wang (67)
Ross Perot (86)
Helen Keller (1880-1968)

Pic: Pinterest

Hooray! It’s that time of year! Dlisted’s favorite pageant contest, World’s Ugliest Dog! The parade of beauty was held Friday night in Petaluma, CA. I personally don’t like to use the word ‘ugly’ unless I’m talking about a celebrity, what a celebrity is wearing or someone that I hate, because it isn’t a very nice word. But, in the case of this contest, ugly means downright stunning and gorgeous. You can see cute puppies everywhere, but to be the world’s ugliest dog, that takes a level of uniqueness that money can’t buy! This year’s winner is Sweepee Rambo.

Sweepee is one hot piece! She weighs in at a svelte 4lbs, is 17 (almost legal!), blind in both eyes, wears a diaper and has bow legs. This is the third time Sweepee entered the competition, but it’s her first win. Last year she placed second behind the hunky Quasi Modo. Finally it was her time to shine and this year she got the top spot, which USA Today tells us comes with a trophy and $1500! I never won the koosh ball I wanted at the fifth grade raffle, so I’m quite jealous of Sweepee’s luxurious prizes. Sweepee, on this day of celebrating diversity and love, to you I say, congratulations. May your reign be as bountiful as you are beautifully ugly.

Here’s more of SweePee in all her glory:

Pics: Splash

In the words of Jeff Goldblum in Jurassic Park, life finds a way. Like tufts of grass between concrete slabs. Or how backwards ass people like the Duggars manage to make it through life. But we’re here to discuss love. Not incesty Duggar stuff, no. Random, head scratching love, but love nonetheless. Jenny Slate and Chris Evans finally stepped out together for a premiere, confirming what we’ve known for months now.

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I’m going to bet that every single one of you saw this coming. It let you know what time it would be landing and where to pick it up. Taylor Swift is (allegedly) not happy. Taylor Swift is (allegedly) not happy one bit about this kontinual Kanye West nonsense! She has put up with the lies and the ego for far too long but the icing on this shit cake is the nude Taylor figure in Kanye’s “Famous” video.

Hollywood Life is reporting that a source type has told them Taylor is cooking something and it isn’t in an Easy Bake Oven. I don’t know if there would be enough double takes in the world if Taylor wasn’t mad… The come to life Disney Princess (in her mind…) certainly doesn’t appreciate nude likenesses of her being used and abused for someone else’s purposes, and she shouldn’t. The source went on to say:

Taylor is furious after seeing Kanye’s video. She feels like she’s been assaulted. She knew he was unpredictable but didn’t think he would go so far. She’s strategizing with her team as to what her next move should be. She’s weighing all her options and will then respond accordingly. Just writing a song dissing him isn’t enough payback for something like this.

No, I can’t imagine a song with a name like “Mr Meany Pants” would do much to hurt Kanye. Unless of course it was a song insulting his taste in pants, then maybe, because we know how Kanye feels about his leather jogging pants. There’s no mention yet of whether she’s planning to sue. So I’m assuming her plan involves calling in all the different witches to show her how to make a poison apple.

Right now, the only person who’s mentioned suing anyone is the attention seeker himself, Kanye. He posted this to Twitter on Saturday, it has since been deleted but Pigeons & Planes got a screenshot:

The celebrities featured in “Famous” should thank him, really. They’re all getting some press out of it. You know who should sue? Us. The people. We’ve been dealing with Kanye’s foolery for too many years. How many eye-rolling muscles have been bruised because of Kanye? I say we call one of those fancy subway lawyers and file a class action. Watch out Kanye, #We’reKoming

Pic: Wenn

Smile, Hoff! Smile! And take all the selfies you want! It’s certainly time to rejoice. Things are on the up and up for a true Hollywood star. The man who had a talking car and brought down the Berlin Wall with just the power of his voice has finally been treated like the treasure he is. A judge has granted him his request to reduce spousal support to his ex-wife, Pamela Bach.

In May, David Hasselhoff’s lawyers filed papers in court asking that a judge reduce the $21k a month he’s been paying Pamela since they split in 2006. The Hoff claimed that he wasn’t raking in money the way he used to and wanted to retire, but couldn’t if he had to continue paying that amount. Pamela shouted “liar” and claimed he’s worth somewhere around $120 million. However, TMZ is reporting that The Hoff and Pamela reached a settlement and he’s now going to fork over $10k a month.

This must have been one messy headache of a fight because in the papers the judge wrote a note saying, “Thank you for the agreement!” I’m not particularly familiar with the legal system, but when a judge writes a note in official documents thanking the parties for letting him get on with his life, you have to assume that shit hit levels even a Hollywood judge couldn’t stomach.

The Hoff’s latest show, Hoff The Record, is enough of a hit over in the UK that there’s been a second season that started in May, so clearly things are looking up for him. Between this gracious judge, Pamela coming to her senses and a hit show, I’d say the only was is up. It’s time for a Hoff comeback and given who’s in the spotlight now, I’d say it couldn’t come sooner.

Pic: Wenn

Vixen!

No glam rocker was as much of a glamorous and gorgeous-faced goddess as Sebastian Bach was, but the AquaNet-covered jewels of Vixen came pretty close. Vixen’s founding guitarist, the late Jan Kuehnemund, created the band of all-goddess glam rockers in St. Paul, Minnesota in the 1970s and after they moved to L.A. in 1985, they became the Queens of the Sunset Strip! Or something. Vixen has had many members throughout the years, but the “classic line-up” was made up of Jan, singer Janet Gardner, bassist Share Pederson and drummer Roxy Petrucci.

Their first hit, and the song I know them best from, was “Edge Of A Broken Heart,” which was co-written by Richard Marx. I listened to this 80s glam rock masterpiece again this morning, and immediately added Vixen to the long list of true artistes that Lady Gaga has copy + pasted from. “Edge Of A Broken Heart” sounds like the flawless diamond to “The Edge of Glory’s” chipped CZ.

WARNING: After you press play on this piece of glam rock perfection, you may find yourself contributing to the end of the ozone layer by teasing and spraying your mane until it’s so stiff that it doesn’t move when you bust out sweet, sexy moves in front of a fan and smoke machine.

Vixen got themselves another hit with “Cryin‘.” They broke up in 1991 after putting out a couple of albums, but they’ve reunited a few times since then.

I know I said before that nothing could save the blasphemous abomination that was the Jem and the Holograms movie, but I take that back. It would’ve ruled the box office if Vixen played The Misfits and about 10 minutes into the movie, they destroyed Jem and the rest of the movie was just them playing their greatest hits.