It’s been a while since we’ve encountered any peculiar activity from Kanye West, but now the time has come! Kanye hasn’t released anything new in years (except for the name of another kid) and now he’s teaming up with his one-time foe Drake to collaborate on a track for his upcoming new album.
Forbes released their list of the five richest artists in hip-hop. Imaginatively titled “The Forbes Five,” we’re told that Hammer, Vanilla Ice, and Brian Austin Green have all the money in (and pretty much out of) hip-hop. I kid. It’s Dre, Diddy, Drake and Marshall Mathers. But the guy with ALL the riches in the world (meaning he’s married to universal majestrix messiah empress Beyonce) is Jay-Z. Mr. Shawn Carter has ALL the money. You could probably tell by his bar tab.
Drake finally put all those goods deeds to music and despite that music, I’m not mad. Apparently Drake and Co donated almost $1 million to regular everyday people in Miami. Outside of the grocery store stunt, the novelty check and the Saks Fifth Ave shopping spree, Drake also surprised a number of very happy people with stacks of cash. Plus a whole lot of other gifting that doesn’t look at all cringy when cut together. Plus, apparently Miami fucking loves Drake! One lady literally fell out when he sidled up to her on a curb.
Here’s the video
I screamed when I saw my girl Odalie at 3:58 looking impassive as hell. She must not drive because Drake was giving out a whole lot of whips with red bows on top. Oprah better watch out, Drake’s coming for her with his car giveaways! The video reads like an earnest love letter to the people of Miami, and who but the grinciest of grinches could be unmoved by a kids’ ice truck dance party. I’ll take three scoops of Antonio Brown, please. Well played Drake, you win this round.
Drake has doubled down on his campaign for sainthood with another over-the-top display of generosity that will be featured in his God’s Plan video. Last time, Drake splashed out at a Miami supermarket picking up the tab for everybody’s groceries. This time, People reports, Drake was moved after reading a feature in The Miami Herald about a hotel maid at a luxury resort who has to commute up to four hours a day due to being pushed out to the ‘berbs because of skyrocketing rents in Miami Beach. So he took her on a shopping spree at Saks Fifth Avenue with NFL star Antonio Brown, natch!
There hasn’t been a Canadian granted Sainthood since St. François de Laval (B.1623, D. 1708), but Drake is poised to knock St. Frank off his high horse and get. that. title, boi! According to E! News, St. Drake spent some time in Miami this week doing good works in the name of the lord. Was he clipping toenails at the leper colony or giving crippled orphans a reverse wheelchair Jimmy with the laying on of hands? Not exactly. Drake was generating footage for his newest music video God’s Plan.
One of the recurring conversation about sexual assault and harassment is that if you see something, say something. According to Page Six, Drake recently saw something during his show in Australia. A male fan in the audience was allegedly groping other women in the audience. Not only did Drake say something about it, he temporarily stopped the show and threatened to beat the shit out of the groper.