Michael already gave you a breakdown of Masterdouche Theatre: The First Act featuring Drake and Kanye West as headliners. Intermission is now over. Wipe that popcorn butter off your greasy hands, hang up that phone call and get back from the bathroom before the lights go out.
Kanye West was not finished with Drake last night, even after Drake called him on the cellphone to apologize. What did Kanye West do about it? What he does worst. Tweet.
Kanye West’s new friend, that talking tree, needs to come and get him because he’s getting messy again.
Kanye’s Fern Gully moment of zen didn’t last long. Kanye added some oil to the pan and reheated his cold, dried-out, rotten beef with Drake. This time Kanye’s b-hole got twisted over Drake’s team asking for clearance to sample his song Say What’s Real. Drake remixed it in 2009. Kanye got mad because he says he’s been trying to talk to Drake for months but Drake has been avoiding him like Kanye avoids a sense of reason. Kanye could’ve, I don’t know, used his finger to open up the Messages app and text Drake, but that wouldn’t have made him trend on Twitter. And if it doesn’t get Kanye attention, it didn’t happen. Cut to Azalea Banks screaming: THE GIRLS ARE FIGHTING!
There are certain times when I see Drake and I say to myself “Yeah, I’d hit it”. And other times, not so much. Well now you can put me down for an extra helping of “Hell Yeah I’d hit that!” because Drake did some thirst trappin’ on his Instagram page while on vacation in Turks & Caicos.
Newly revealed parental unit and big Stranger Things fan Drake used his Instagram Story to claim that a casino in Vancouver, BC racially profiled him and wouldn’t allow him to gamble, according to The Wrap. Parq Casino didn’t deny the accusation but they did say they’re not racists and moaned that running a casino is hard work. The main question here is who didn’t recognize Drake? Especially if he was wearing a sweater? What does he have to do – roll himself through there in a wheelchair to be recognized for the international hip-hop sensation that he is and former Nickelodeon child that he was?
Hold the presses! It wasn’t Kanye who told Pusha-T about Drake’s “love” child, it was the one armed man! According to Pusha, the one armed man who spilled the beans about Drake’s spilled seed, is Drake’s own long-time producer Noah “40” Shebib. Last Friday, Drake went on LeBron James’ HBO show The Shop and claimed that he had told Kanye about his son in confidence, and that once the Pusha-T beef really ignited, he knew some shit was going to come out about the kid (Kanye is Pusha’s producer). In response to Drake’s assumption that Kanye’s got the loosest lips in the game, Pusha appeared on The Joe Budden Podcast and tried to push Kanye out of the way of Wheelchair Jimmy rolling up on him to squish his toes.
As previously revealed, Drake has a one-year-old love child son with ex-porn actress Sophie Brussaux. The child, whom Drake finally acknowledged in a track on his current record Scorpion, was first referenced by Drake’s current arch-enemy Pusha T in a diss track. However, Drake claims it was actually Kanye West who first opened his mouth and let out a birth announcement about Drake’s kid, which led to Pusha putting Wheelchair Jimmy on blast. Drake, who says that he had told “YE” about the kid in confidence, was unappreciative of Kanye stepping in for that card you usually get in the mail with the big ugly fonts superimposed over a pic of the rough-looking newborn. US Weekly reports that Drake revealed all of this in an interview with LeBron James on HBO”s The Shop. It’s the first time he’s talked about his kid other than rapping about him.