Haven’t we all been Kratu at one time or another? Haven’t we all worn a spiritual t-shirt that read “FUCK EFFORT” at some point in our lives? Especially when our bossy owners are trying to make us run some undignified obstacle course.
According to Wikipedia, a quokka is a “is a small macropod.” What the entry fails to mention is how adorable quokkas are! They’re so adorable nibbling on little bamboo shoots or whatever that they even take some of the spotlight off of Thor Odinson (aka thirst deity Chris Hemsworth)!
Natalie Portman should go ahead and pass the “false idol” she won for Black Swan to the star of the reboot called Black and White Swan, because this swan outdoes her with a riveting performance of a graceful beauty taking down a trick getting in its lane.
Page A D is reporting that there is someone out there who has completely lost their damn mind! While performing at a show recently, iconic diva extraordinaire with hair that won’t quit Miss Diana Ross was assaulted by a psychopath! Someone, who must’ve been absent the day in preschool when we all learned to keep our paws to ourselves, poked her as she performed.
If you’re a dog lover and happen to be at work, throw a cardigan (I know your ass has one if you work in an office since many of those places are an A/C tundra) over your lap before reading this story. Because this story may make your chonies rip themselves off your body before throwing themselves at the dog-saving hero on the screen. What am I saying? Dlisted readers don’t wear panties!
Elon Musk has finally found a way to get Tesla some good publicity after he spent his summer driving their name into the ground. First he called a Thai cave rescuer a pedophile. Then his girlfriend at the time, Grimes, invited her friend Azealia Banks, to come party at Elon’s house and she ended up exposing him. And then he plummeted stock prices by getting high with douche-bro legend Joe Rogan. And finally, Elon got charged with securities fraud. This all led to Elon having to step down as chairman of the company. Best summer ever, amirite!? Well Elon found a way to salvage things with one simple tool: DOGS!