On Saturday Night Live last night, Alec Baldwin made his 987,829th appearance as Jabba the Trump (in a skit that also featured an appearance by Beck Bennett’s Putin nips), but the skit that’s really making the rounds today is the sexual harassment pop anthem called Welcome To Hell that was cooed out by the women of SNL and Saoirse Ronan (who gave me baby Erika Jayne meets baby Baby Spice. So Fetus Spice, basically).
I heard you! I heard you, the one in the back who hissed “who cares?” Well, someone obviously does! She sold 700,000 copies of her new record “Reputation” in the U.S. on the first day of its release, according to Billboard. If this sales pace keeps up, she will hit a million in sales in the first week alone. And furthermore, industry sources say that she’s probably going to have the largest sales week of her carefully coordinated career. No matter how irritating some of us find her (you can put your hands down), Swifty can sell. Continue reading
From rape, rape, rape to jokes about concentration camps – the news has felt like a walk through Willy Wonka’s factory this week. A walk that took place after Augustus Gloop tainted the chocolate river and the smoke from Veruca Salt in the incinerator fouled up the building. Larry David hosted Saturday night Live last night and cracked wise about hitting on women in concentration camps. Do they remove a portion of these older Hollywood guys’ frontal lobes when they reach a certain age? Continue reading
One of the better sketches from last night’s Saturday Night Live featured their star player Kate McKinnon playing completely delusional #MAGA apologist Kellyane Conway as the murderous clown demon Pennywise from It. Kellyanne actually didn’t need any more makeup or allusions to horror movies to make her more terrifying but this was pretty much spot-on.
You could sort of see her staging a press conference from a sewer due to a nuclear war with North Korea and explaining it away as “President Trump wanted me to demonstrate how this country’s infrastructure is crumbling because of Obama, and I’m in this sewer to highlight all of the damage that POTUS is trying to fix.” Eventually, “Kellywise” manages to bite Anderson Cooper’s arm off and drag him down with her. Honestly, because of the way that things have been going, that doesn’t seem very far-fetched.
There’s very few things that could make me appreciate the wig-patting simper of Jimmy Fallon. This isn’t one of those things. Fortunately, Seth Meyers passes muster, and he offset his former co-worker’s presence last night on Saturday Night Live Weekend Update Thursday.
Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson hosted the Saturday Night Live season finale last night and announced he was running for president, as he threatened in GQ. He also brought out America’s Dad Tom Hanks and announced him as his running mate. I’m on board.
Right now, I’d stump for a facecloth, or a teacup poodle or an impacted molar for POTUS at this point. Literally, ANYTHING would be better than the “berzerker child” option with which America went. Check out The Rock’s monologue, below.
SNL also revisited their post-election cold open. This time, instead of Kate McKinnon covering Hillary Clinton covering Leonard Cohen, it was Alec Baldwin as Donald Trump and the rest of the cast as his administration and family (with a surprise cameo from Scarlett Johansson as Ivanka “Complicit” Trump). Here it is:
Wait, SNL’s done for the season? Where am I going to get my news? Will Anderson Cooper keep insulting the president’s lackeys on CNN? Can we get confirmation on that? That could be my sole news source now if he keeps being a shady lady to stupids.