Category: Melissa Etheridge

Melissa Etheridge Reveals She Helped Many Other Celebs Come Out, Including Ricky Martin

September 28, 2022 / Posted by:

We may have become accustomed to LGBTQ+ celebs parachuting out of their closets with rainbow flags NOW,  but they’re all a day late and about thirty years of dollars too short. Because back in the 90s when most celebrities lived inside closets locked behind vaults in underground bunkers, Melissa Etheridge kicked her closet door down and started slapping away at bitches with her guitar when she announced she was a lesbian a few months before the release of her album Yes I Am in 1993. Now as the 30th anniversary of this groundbreaking album looms near, Melissa is revealing a few other celebs she helped come out during their journey. And although she notes Ricky Martin as someone else who sought her assistance she also soothed his fears by saying “Aww sweetie, we already know.”

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Following In Melissa Etheridge’s Footsteps, Chelsea Handler Is Done Publicly Hating On Angelina Jolie

April 13, 2019 / Posted by:

It’s a brave new world when Chelsea Handler reveals that she will no longer be air-kissing the c-word over at Angelina Jolie anymore. Life seems so strange and unfamiliar now that Chelsea Handler is wishing Angelina Jolie good luck on talk shows! ET reports that Chelsea told yappy celebrity ass-licker Andy Cohen on Watch What Happens Live this week that she’s through publicly shitting on her arch-nemesis Angelina Jolie. Meanwhile, in some refugee camp somewhere, Angelina Jolie overheard the name “Chelsea Handler” in relation to hers on Radio Free Europe or whatever and asked aloud, “who?”

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Melissa Etheridge’s Mug Shot Wouldn’t Hurt A Fly

October 16, 2017 / Posted by:

Melissa Etheridge was arrested in North Dakota for possession of drugs by U.S. Customs and Border Control after returning from Canada back in August. According to TMZ, a K9 unit of drug sniffing dogs searched her tour bus and found a stockpile of drugs so shocking, so brazenly devious that it prompted this happy mug shot for the ages. Now I’m not saying that Melissa was a happy kind of stoned in her mug shot, but I am saying that Melissa was a happy kind of stoned in her mug shot, and that’s the only way to be.

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Melissa Etheridge Smokes The Good Shit With Her Grown Kids 

April 17, 2017 / Posted by:

Seen above making the kind of smile you make after taking a long toke of a new strain that hit you just right, Melissa Etheridge talked about her love of heaven’s most beautiful plant, weed, with Yahoo!’s project Weed & the American Family. Melissa says that as a good shit advocate, she’s working to erase the stigma of marijuana smokers. Melissa says that in her house, all her children know that she smokes, and she doesn’t smoke around her young ones, but she does get high with her oldest ones. And just like that, Brad Pitt burped up a text to his ex-friend Melissa asking her if she’d adopt him.

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St. Angie Jolie’s Fixer Supposedly Warned Melissa Etheridge And She Wrote A Song About It

October 6, 2016 / Posted by:

The latest leg of Melissa Etheridge’sAngelina Jolie Is A Nasty Demon Cuntress Tour” made a stop on Bravo’s Watch What Happens Live last night and she debuted a brand new song that I’m sure will soon be #1 on Angelina Jolie’s iTunes playlist. Melissa was on Andy’s SiriusXM radio show on Monday and she said that the allegations that her old friend Brad Pitt went crazy on Maddox are “completely unfounded” and she accused Team St. Angie of leaking fake stories to the media. Melissa also brought up how during Angie’s BBP (Before Brad Pitt) days, she and Billy Bob Thornton acted real nasty toward Laura Dern. On WWHL last night, Melissa said that Team St. Angie went after her about the things she said and she responded to them with a lil’ diddy!

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Melissa Etheridge Is Firmly On Team Brad

October 4, 2016 / Posted by:

Before Brad Pitt became one half of the holiest couples since Jan Crouch and Krylon clear acrylic spray (only beauty amateurs use hairspray), he was good friends with Melissa Etheridge and as every Brangelina/Aniston historian knows, she sang at his wedding to Jennifer Aniston. When Brad got with Angelina Jolie, the power of Brangelina broke up a lot of his friendships including the one he had with Melissa. Melissa and Brad haven’t seen each other in 10 years, but that has never kept her from spitting out her thoughts about Devilina Holie! And yesterday, Melissa gave her thoughts on the fall of Brangelina during a talk with Andy Cohen on his SiriusXM show. The next time Melissa walks by a church’s stained glass window with a saint in it, she shouldn’t be surprised when that saint side-eyes and hisses at her, because she dragged St. Angie a bit.

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