Category: Javier Bardem

Jason Momoa Will Be Joining The Cast Of The “Dune” Remake

February 15, 2019 / Posted by:

The Dune remake that’s set to star everybody’s favorite little peach fucker Timothée Chalamet is about to get a hot beef injection with the addition of everybody’s favorite fish-man (sorry James Cameron, you lose again!) Jason Momoa. Jason will be playing the character of sword-master (tee-hee) Duncan Idaho. According to Deadline:

Momoa joins an already stellar cast of Timothée Chalamet, Rebecca Ferguson, Zendaya, Oscar Isaac, Dave Bautista, Stellan Skarsgård, Charlotte Rampling, Javier Bardem, and Josh Brolin. The script was written by (Denis) Villeneuve, Eric Roth and Jon Spaihts.

I tried to read Dune once and it did not go well (I kept falling asleep). I also tried to watch the 1984 David Lynch one, and that did not go well either (I fell asleep). Then my nerdy ass husband tried to make me watch the miniseries from 2000 that was on the Sci-Fi Channel and well, I think you can guess how that went (you guys, it was so boring and I was really tired, ok). Therefore, I only know enough about Dune to make jokes about spice eyes and sand worms. Which is plenty good enough for me! Thank god for Wikipedia though. I can tell you that Jason probably won’t have to cut off his hair and get divorced from Lisa Bonet, because according to the 1965 novel, Duncan is described as “a handsome man with ‘curling black hair’ to whom women are easily attracted”. So it sounds like they hit the nail on the head there.

Pic: Wenn.com

Javier Bardem Is Still Standing By Woody Allen

October 17, 2018 / Posted by:

In April, Javier Bardem admitted during an interview that he had doubts about Dylan Farrow’s allegations against Woody Allen. Javier added that the only way he’d stop working with Woody is if there was evidence proving that Woody is a creep of the highest order. Javier worked with Woody on Vicky Cristina Barcelona, a movie in which his wife Penelope Cruz ended up winning a Best Supporting Actress Oscar. So clearly Woody has some kind of special, weird place in his heart. A heart that probably has received many messages from the brain asking, “Are you sure you want to keep that creep Woody around?

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Woody Allen Has Javier Bardem’s Support

April 20, 2018 / Posted by:

Woody Allen’s next movie is probably going to have to star Diane Keaton, Alec Baldwin, Cate Blanchett, and maybe Kate Winslet if he’s lucky (depending on the current state of her “bitter regrets”). Poor Woody, that’s really scraping the bottom of the barrel! Luckily, he can add Javier Bardem to the list of actors who will still fuck with him, so that’s at least one more second-rate unknown bit player Woody can count on.

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“Howdy, And Welcome To Miss Jenny’s Good Time Saloon”

September 11, 2017 / Posted by:

Jennifer Lawrence made her long-awaited return to the Toronto International Film Festival yesterday for the premiere of mother!, a film which will reportedly make you say “What in the fuck?” in either the good way or the bad way. JLaw didn’t trip up the red carpet, but she did arrive looking like the madame of a My Fair Lady-inspired cathouse. “You could do more than dance all night, but it’s gonna cost you an extra $200, hun. And I don’t want to hear about the ‘rain’ in Spain falling anywhere but the plain, you catch my drift?

I get about 98% of her Dolce & Gabbana look here (sparkles, ribbons, boobies – all major players in a razzle-dazzle moment). But then my eyes got to the shoes and I was very confuse.

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Jennifer Lawrence And Darren Aronofsky Make Their First Red Carpet Couple Debut

September 5, 2017 / Posted by:

After about a year of dating, Jennifer Lawrence and her director-turned-assistant producer (that was my extremely lame attempt at a film industry-themed sex joke) Darren Aronofsy made their red carpet debut. Actually, it’s not really a red carpet so much as it’s a grey laminate floor. And it’s really only a relationship debut if you consider the definition of a debut to include posing for a picture in the vicinity of each other at the photocall for the movie you made together. You know what? When you’re dealing with two people who stopped working it for the paps back in November, you take what you can get.

Jennifer and Darren, as well as their mother! co-stars Javier Bardem and Michelle Pfeiffer, attended the photocall for their creepy (and so far well received) movie at the Venice Film Festival today. Jennifer and Darren decided not to stand next to each other, which is smart. I’ve always believed that getting attention is a marathon, not a sprint. Pace your PDA. You’ve got to save something for TIFF, you know?

Although there is a potential issue I can foresee. I know I’m supposed to be caring that Jennifer Lawrence and Darren Aronofsky stood adjacent to each other, but my eyes are being drawn to more exciting visions. One, Michelle Pfeiffer, who is serving up an extra-hot heaping helping of steal-your-man sex-in-sofa upholstery. Two, whatever the hell hair color is happening on Javier Bardem’s head. Someone get Javier a Clairol Nice’n Easy customer service rep on the phone and ask what they would recommend to tone down the brassiness from Autumn Chestnut to Cool Cappuccino.

Here’s more from the photocall, as well as some pics from the premiere today:

Pics: Wenn.com

The Trailer For Darren Aronofsky’s “Mother!” Has Arrived

August 8, 2017 / Posted by:

No wonder they fell in love! Who would have guessed that the long anticipated movie Mother!, the one that brought together lovebirds Jennifer Lawrence and director Darren Aronofsky, would turn out to be a rom-com!? The trailer for Mother! has just come out, and it looks like a delight. In a departure from his usual dark, demented and psychologically thorny fare, this one looks like an absolute lark.

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