Alec Baldwin Was Formally Charged With Manslaughter Today, And Hilaria Baldwin Said It’s Been An Emotional Time For Their Family
Alec Baldwin’s been spending his time on the outside world on Instagram, posting a pic of one of his thousand children alongside an unsettlingly suggestive caption and begging people to help his fugazi señora, Hilaria Thomas Baldwin (seen above dreaming up ways to smuggle Baldwinito Batter in a condom out of the prison visitation room) reach a million followers. But it’s a real possibility that he may soon have to live in captivity. Earlier this month, we heard that he’d be charged for his role in the accidental shooting death of Halyna Hutchins on the Santa Fe, NM set of Rust, and today he was formally charged with manslaughter. Of course, the always-attention-ready Hillary Tomás took the opportunity to speak about it. This time, she took to her podcast, Witches Anonymous, to discuss the emotional toll all of this has had on their family rather than employing her last PR strategy of stepping out in a sweatshirt with a laughable quality she doesn’t possess splayed across her always-nursing chichis while yelling at the paps in Spanglish.
Now that Alec Baldwin has officially been charged with involuntary manslaughter for his involvement in the Rust shooting, the Baldwin family is on high alert. Expect less desperate pleas for followers and more Instagram screeds decrying a corrupt justice system or Spanglish posts requesting empathy (it should actually be sympathy but let’s not split pelos). Speaking of foreign languages, with no babies on the horizon or legal charges to pull the attention towards her, Hilaria Baldwin thought it was a good time to whip out her authentic Spanish accento in front of the paps. That will surely ingratiate her and Alec to the public!
Alec And Hilaria Baldwin (Along With Their Child Army) Reacted To Ireland Baldwin’s Pregnancy Announcement
Alec Baldwin will soon have pop-pop duties aside from yelling “pop! pop!” on the set of Rust with a real gun or as he’s angrily pointing finger-guns at the paparazzi, even though they probably don’t care to snap him these days since his “culturally fluid” wife, Hilaria Thomas (Tomás?) Baldwin, shares their every mundane el movimiento on Instagram. And in true Hillary fashion, she just shared a video of her, Alec, and their seven rowdy Baldwinitos making Ireland Baldwin’s recent pregnancy announcement all about them.
When Alec Baldwin is not busy combating his many enemies and withholding his phone from the authorities, he’s welcoming another kid into the world. Yes, there’s a brand new Baldwinito on the scene. I guess Hilaria Baldwin took that “somos un buen equipo” engraving on her wedding band seriously because she’s now just three kids short of un fútbol team! Alec might want to train up some of those kids in the legal arts instead of kicking a soccer ball because a new child isn’t going to win him sympathy points. Unless that baby comes with a Harvard law degree, Alec will still have to face the consequences of his actions in court.
2021 has been a tough year for many of us, what with diseases running rampant and other global issues. But we need to collectively put aside our selfish problems and concerns and focus on what’s really important: Hilaria Baldwin! And let me tell you, this poor culturally fluid soul has had a difficult year through no fault of her own. It’s all the jealous haters that are ruining her life and brand sponsorships! Shame on us as a society for letting this paragon of truth and Spanish culture suffer silently (through multiple long-winded Instagram posts).
With all that’s been going on I kind of forgot that Hilaria Baldwin was pregnant, but in my defense, when isn’t she? According to People, right now if we’re quick about it! Hilaria and Alec Baldwin welcomed their fifth child together, a baby boy, last night. I’m sure it’s a great relief to Alec and Hilaria to have the new baby safely delivered into the world given that Hilaria suffered two back-to-back miscarriages. Alec and Hilaria both shared the good news on Instagram with Hilaria announcing “stay tuned for a name.” She’s probably already busy stretching and will announce the name using a series of yoga alphabet poses.