Category: Kate Moss
Kate Moss Is Probably Still With Her 28-Year-Old Boyfriend
Yesterday, The Daily Mail reported that Kate Moss had broken up with her 28-year-old boyfriend with the soap opera villain name, Count Nikolai von Bismarck, and was currently catwalking her 42-year-old business all over the 18-year-old son of the director of Love Actually. Neither Kate nor her teenage maybe-boyfriend Jake Curtis had confirmed that they were dating. But something must have happened last night, because as of today, that DM article about Kate and Jake no longer exists. I knew Kate could make a white line disappear in the blink of an eye, but she may also have the power to make stories quickly vanish too!
And as you can see, Count Nikolai von Bismarck appears to be back in the picture. Last night was the launch of Kate’s new clothing line and she brought Count Nicki as her date. Kate’s clothing launch was held at the Chiltern Firehouse Hotel, so I figured that maybe Kate had to bring Count as her date because her other boyfriend was too young to be in a bar. But then I did a little research and discovered that the legal drinking age in London is 18, so technically she could have brought him. Maybe she had to bring Count because she needed someone who had at least a couple of years of alcohol tolerance building under his belt and could watch out for her when she inevitably gets drunk and stumbly. Always bring a date who won’t get drunk off of one beer and can make sure you don’t end up riding down a staircase on your ass.
Here’s more of Kate and Count at her fashion launch last night, as well as some of them leaving the Chiltern Firehouse the next morning. I don’t know if Kate is wearing an outfit from her new clothing line, but if she is, then I’m interested. 1979 banquet hall bandleader is always a good look.
Kate Moss Might Be Dating An 18-Year-Old
Kate Moss might have a new boyfriend in her life, and when I say “boyfriend“, I mean he is literally two birthdays older than what the UK’s age of consent laws technically consider to be a “boy.”
Ricky Martin And His New Piece Are Now On My Celebrity Sex Tape Wish List
Who cares if Ricky Martin’s shirt looks like it’s covered in flattened cockroaches and stepped-on bunny poop? Who also cares if Ricky Martin’s face looks like it was reupholstered in pieces cut out from the sun-damaged leather Levitz couch my tia kept on her backyard patio for years? Who cares about any of that? I doubt Ricky Martin gives a fuck , because he’s too busy humping on his hot new piece.
Kate Moss Injured While Speeding On Enormous White Mountain
I’m going to preface all this by saying that I love skiing, grew up skiing, still ski and so therefore know full well that one small mistake can result in a serious injury. Having said that, when God gives you a story that writes its own cheap coke jokes, you take it.
Elizabeth Olsen Vs. A Gust Of French Wind
Wind truly is the shameless pervert of the weather world. It’s always blowing up skirts and blowing against the crotch parts of pants. Sure, rain makes everyone look like they’re starring in a low-budget wet clothes fetish porno, but at least rain helps flowers grow. Wind does nothing but embarrass you. Case in point, Elizabeth Olsen at a Miu Miu fragrance launch in Paris on Saturday. Chris Evans’ secret on-set girlfriend showed up wearing a dress from the Shirley Partridge Collection, and it only took about three seconds in front of the paps before that sleazy creep came and blew up her dress. Inappropriate, wind!
Thankfully, Elizabeth brought a pussy-hiding purse with her and she was able to push her dress back down. Still, she might want to take a cue from The Queen and fill her skirt hem full of weights next time. And yes, there will be a next time – there’s always a chance that a no-good skirt-flipping gust of wind is lurking around, ready to pounce and expose your down-lows. The wind is the Joe Francis of the meteorology world.
But if Elizabeth really wants to get back at the wind, she could always ask her pocket goth older sisters, the Olsen Twins, to put a curse on it. What am I saying? They probably already have beef with the wind. One strong gust, and they’re blown thirty feet into the air like two plastic bags.
Here’s more of Elizabeth at the Miu Miu event, as well as Kate Moss, Amber Heard, the Gyllenhaal-Sarsgaards, and Sally Draper.
Pics: Splash/INF
Kate Moss Allegedly Got Kicked Off Of An easyJet Flight For Being A Drunken Mess
Passengers on an easyJet flight that landed at London Luton airport overdosed on potent amounts of elegance, class and gentility yesterday when they watched a 41-year-old supermodel call the pilot a “basic bitch” as her drunk ass was dragged off of the plane for screaming about wanting a damn drink and pouring herself her own drink from a bottle of vodka she had in her luggage. One passenger was overheard saying, “It’s like I’m in an episode of Downton Fucking Abbey,” while watching Kate Moss bust into a vodka rage before getting kicked off of a budget airline.