Category: I’m Only Here For The Food

Open Post: Hosted By The Taco Bell Customer Who Held Up A Drive-Thru Line By Ordering $300 Worth Of Tacos

August 21, 2022 / Posted by:

Taco Bell is both a much beloved and much maligned fast-food establishment within the American psyche. It’s not uncommon to hear a person decry the menu for being “terrible fake Mexican food” only to turn around to see them blissfully scarfing down four Chalupa Supremes at 3 AM after a big night out. For better or for worse, deep down we all love Taco Bell. However, some people don’t need to wait until after midnight to satisfy their Crunchwrap cravings. A recent patron of the restaurant decided to Live Mas by ordering nearly $300 worth of tacos, much to the chagrin of those waiting in line behind them!

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Open Post: Hosted By The Possible End Of Olive Garden’s Never-Ending Pasta Bowl

December 26, 2021 / Posted by:

I hope you’ve been having a pleasant holiday season with life, laughter, and love because I’ve got some bad news that I’m loathed to share. Olive Garden, authentic Italian eatery and second-home to Paisanos everywhere, is potentially ending its popular Never-Ending Pasta Bowl. Looks like Olive Garden is committed to the “We’re all family here” slogan. Only family would dare take away something you love without a decent explanation!

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A 17-Year-Old Got Trader Joe’s To Drop All The Problematic Variations Of “Joe”

July 22, 2020 / Posted by:

2020 has been a trash year, but that doesn’t negate the fact that it’s also the year for a lot of long-overdue makeovers (my 6 inches of root regrowth just gained an ounce of hope, but no – I’m not talking about my current hair situation). We’ve got Lady A and The Chicks realizing the error of their naming ways. Aunt Jemima, Cream of Wheat, and Uncle Ben’s have confronted the racist roots of their mascots. Even the Cleveland Indians might finally change their name. Anyone who has ever spent some time in a Trader Joe’s knows that part of their branding involves using a regionally-specific version of the name Joe to reflect certain cuisines. To some, the names might not be that big of a deal. To others, they felt like a cringeworthy throwback to another time. Well, a teen who clearly fell into the second group complained to Trader Joe’s about that. And Trader Joe’s agreed.

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Open Post: Hosted By This Black Bear Who Broke Into A House For Pizza

July 13, 2020 / Posted by:

Mmmm, night pizza. What wouldn’t I do for it? The answer is: Not much! A Canadian black bear agrees. She (I’ve decided it’s a “she” cuz I relate so much to her journey) broke into the front room of a house in Oro-Medonte, Ontario, Canada this past Saturday, lured by the scent of delicious Italian pie. Tragically, she soon discovered the three pizza boxes she was baited by were completely empty. Stupid powerful bear nose that’s over 2,000 times stronger than any human’s! Continue reading

Chris Pratt Let Everyone Know His Wife Katherine Schwarzenegger Can’t Cook A Bagel Bite

October 21, 2019 / Posted by:

Chris Pratt and Katherine Schwarzenegger wasted no time getting married, and apparently they can’t wait to make babies. But if Katherine is hoping to get her husband in the baby-making mood with a romantic meal, it sounds like the sexiest thing she could whisper in his ear is, “I just placed an order with Uber Eats.” Because Chris Pratt recently exposed his wife as the kind of person who can’t even use the damn microwave.

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