Category: How Dreadful

Charlotte Kirk’s Current Man, Director Neil Marshall, Has Been Accused Of Trying To Extort Ron Meyer

August 20, 2020 / Posted by:

Before this week, the name Charlotte Kirk would make everyone’s brain bring up MariahCareyIDontKnowHer.GIF, which excuse you, this is the huge British movie star who played the pivotal role of “Russian Bride” in 2016’s Kat Fight!. Educate yourselves! But Charlotte Kirk is now known as the center of an ESCANDALO involving the downfall of two studio heads, Ron Meyer and Kevin Tsujihara. And now the names of two directors, Neil Marshall and Joshua Newton, have been added to this saga. Neil, who is currently with Charlotte (The Hollywood Reporter claims they’re married), has been accused of trying to extort Ron Meyer into greenlighting a movie project in exchange for keeping Ron’s affair with Charlotte on the hush. Listen, IN THIS ECONOMY, you gotta do what you gotta do to pay the bills. Some people are selling masks on Etsy. Some people are selling ass shots on OnlyFans. And some people are extorting the married studio mogul their now-wife had an affair with years ago.

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And In “Somebody Must Need A Check In A Bad Way” News….

January 13, 2017 / Posted by:

The Grammys are on February 12, and I’m sure that the likes of Beyonce, Adele, Drake and Rihanna are all going to show up, but really, who cares about that dusty ceremony filled with has-beens and Zzzz-listers? Because next week, a bigly star-studded musical event is going to go down. The Hollywood Reporter confirms that a line-up of sparkly stars from the A-list universe have signed on to perform at Donald Trump’s pre-inauguration concert. That “line-up of sparkly stars from the A-list universe” line wasn’t wrapped in sarcasm. I only had to Google the names of like one or two performers and when it comes to Trump’s inauguration, that makes it 100% A-list!

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Ungrateful Workers At Kensington Palace Threaten To Go On Strike Over A Pay Cut!

February 23, 2016 / Posted by:

Shortly after this picture was taken, Prince William and Duchess Kate flew off to Bora Bora where they spent 9 days resting their wrists in a spa because they strained themselves something bad while holding that umbrella and that clutch.

It’s truly hard to find good help who are grateful that they get to be in the presence of royal greatness and won’t bitch about trivial things like paying their bills and feeding their families. Can you believe that there’s people out there who are lucky enough to work for their future King and yet they’re threatening to strike because they may get a pay cut that’ll put them below a living wage? In THE QUEEN’s day, she would’ve punished those ungrateful peasants by turning them into human leather skin jackets for her Corgis to wear.

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Paul McCartney Couldn’t Get Into Tyga’s Grammys After-Party

February 16, 2016 / Posted by:

Many of us would probably rather sit through an audit by the IRS while wearing Crocs than sit at a party hosted by gross slug Tyga, but not Paul McCartney, Beck and Taylor Hawkins from Foo Fighters. Tyga hosted a Grammys after-party last night at the Argyle and Paul, Beck and Taylor apparently tried to get in but were denied by the door people. When Paul and company were turned away, he joked, “How VIP do we gotta get?” and “We need another hit, guys!

I don’t know if it’s embarrassing or a compliment to get denied from that salamander douche’s party. I’ll go with the latter. You’re probably wondering why would Paul want to go to that salamander douches party. I came up with 3 reasons:

1. Paul is a down-low Scientologist and he and Beck were trying to steal Tyga away from that “other” cult (the Kardashians).

2. Paul is losing it.

3. Paul was confused and thought that “Tyga” is short for “La Tigresa del Oriente” and who wouldn’t want to go to La Tigresa del Oriente’s party?

But apparently, none of those reasons are right. The Argyle tells TMZ that Paul got shit mixed up and was trying to go to Mark Ronson’s party at Hyde. When he figured out he was at the wrong club, he left. Even though the video shows them getting turned away, the Argyle claims they would’ve let them in if they wanted in.

Here’s the sad, sad scene brought to you by TMZ:

It does make sense that Paul was turned away from Tyga’s party. I mean, to get into a party hosted by Tyga, you either have to be a teenage girl or you have to BYOTDTPOTANR (Bring Your Own Teenage Daughter To Pimp Out To A Nobody Rapper).

When Post-Sex Selfie Blackmail Goes Wrong

September 22, 2015 / Posted by:

Jaromir Jagr is a 43-year-old professional hockey player from the Czech Republic who currently plays for the Florida Panthers. Jaromir isn’t married and he recently boned an 18-year-old model. The model took a post-fuck selfie of them in bed together. Either the model or someone else threatened to release the selfie if Jaromir didn’t give them $2,000, because you know, a 40-something professional athlete screwing a barely legal model is some career-ruining scandalous shit. Only it isn’t. It would’ve been more shocking if the chick in bed with him was his age. Jaromir knows it ain’t no big deal, so he said, “I don’t care,” to the blackmailer’s demands. Whoops.

The Czech tabloid Blesk (via The Daily Beast) was the first to report the failed extortion attempt. Some reports claim that the 18-year-old model, known as “Catherine from Moravia,” was the blackmailer. Other reports claim that the picture made the rounds on Czech social media and someone other than “Catherine” tried to use it get money out of Jaromir. The blackmailer ended up with a handful of nothing, because when they told Jaromir that they were going to leak the picture if he didn’t pay them $2,000, he literally said, “I don’t care.” That sad extortion conversation probably went a little something like this:

Blackmailer: We want $2,000.

JJ: No.

Blackmailer: Okay, $500!

JJ: No.

Blackmailer: Pay our Netflix bill for a year?

JJ: No.

Blackmailer: Okay, last offer, two Quarter Pounders from McDonald’s and a 3-day bus pass.

JJ: No.

Blackmailer: Reimburse us for this call then?

JJ: No.

If Catherine was the blackmailer, that’s two thousand layers of sad, because it’s always a tragic day when a gold digger doesn’t meet her goal. It would also be sad, because Catherine is apparently dating Czech junior player Dominik Rudl and this exposes her ass. Whoever the blackmailer was, they should’ve known that Jaromir Jagr is already a member of the National League Of No Fucks To Give. There’s many, many more embarrassing pictures of Jaromir out there. I mean, there’s picture after picture of him looking like this:


If Jaromir doesn’t care about a picture of him with a “horse with a bad Ogilvie home perm” mullet, he’s definitely not going to care about a picture of him in bed with a naked 18-year-old model.

Pic: AP

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