Rob Kardashian No Longer Has To Pay Blac Chyna Child Support

/ March 26, 2019

Blac Chyna and failed sock mogul Rob Kardashian have been fighting over custody and child support for months, and it looked liked they settled the mess by the end of last month. There wasn’t much info at the time, and I’m sure we all couldn’t wait to hear every last detail of what made these two idiots rub their last brain cells together and come up with a plan, but now TMZ has all the tea. And Chyna’s glass is bitter AF. It’s not looking good for Chyna in terms of her ca$$$$hing in on the Koven. It’s seems that the Kardashian Gravy Train will no longer be pulling it’s fat ass into Blac Chyna Station as Rob is going to be paying Blac Chyna a whopping $0 in monthly child support.

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ANOTHER PLOT TWIST! All Criminal Charges Against Jussie Smollett Have Been Dropped (UPDATE)

/ March 26, 2019

The entire production team at Empire needs to drop whatever they’re doing and start filming every piece of this Jussie Smollett situation, because it’s more riveting, ESCANDALOSO, dramatic, and has more plot twists than any  of their story arcs combined. Jussie was charged with several felonies for allegedly staging a hate crime in Chicago (with help from the Nigerian Right Said Fred), and those charges got him scrubbed from the rest of the season of Empire. I’m sure that Jussie was working on Empire: The Musical, which he was going to put on for the prison musical, but he can stop doing that for now, because all 16 charges against him have been dropped and his record has been wiped clean. Every prisoner who was making a Cookie wig out of shredded bed sheets and commissary-bought markers to audition for Jussie’s prison musical is going to be so disappointed.

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Elisabeth Hasselback Is Disturbed And Offended By Rosie O’Donnell Once Having A Crush On Her 

/ March 26, 2019

The new book about all the secret goings-on behind the scenes of The Hen House, aka The View–Ladies Who Punch: The Explosive Inside Story of The View–is revealing more behind-the-scenes messiness. Nothing as messy and exciting as Kathy Griffin explaining Barbara Walters favorite kind of lubricant, but it’s close-ish. This new dingleberry of info is that Rosie O’Donnell had a crush on her alleged arch-nemesis, Elisabeth Hasselbeck. That has made Elisabeth get on her knees…and pray for Rosie’s sinful lesbian soul!

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Hot Slut Of The Day!

/ March 26, 2019

Crystal Ball Dog!

Finally, finally, finally! I’ve been waiting for someone, anyone, to take down that fraudulent twink Tyler Henry and that peroxide Bride of Frankenfraud Theresa Caputo as the country’s most famous spiritual guide, ghost whisperer, and future-seer. And we finally found someone, and this one actually has skills!

If you’ve said before, “Shit, anything will go viral these days, like a dog staring at an empty snow globe would totally go viral,” then not only were you right, but you’re also a bona fide SLYCIC. Because the internet’s new favorite fortune teller is a Redditor’s crystal ball reading dog. We’ve all heard of seeing eye dogs before, but this is a SEES FUCKING ALL dog.

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Birthday Sluts

/ March 26, 2019
Diana Ross (75)
Nina Agdal (27)
Carly Chaikin (29)
Jonathan Groff (34)
Keira Knightley (34)
Sara Jean Underwood (35)
Amy Smart (43)
Natasha Leggero (45)
T. R. Knight (46)
Larry Page (46)
Leslie Mann (47)
James Iha (51)
Kenny Chesney (51)
Michael Imperioli (53)

Pic: Wenn.com

Eric Allen Kramer (57)
Jennifer Grey (59)
Leeza Gibbons (62)
Martin Short (69)
Vicki Lawrence (70)
Steven Tyler (71)
James Caan (79)
Nancy Pelosi (79)
Alan Arkin (85)
Sandra Day O’Connor (88)
Leigh Bowery (1961-1994)
Leonard Nimoy (1931-2015)
Tennessee Williams (1911-1983)
Robert Frost (1874-1963)
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Night Crumbs

/ March 25, 2019

Us brought in $70 million over the weekend, and $12 of that came from me, and another $12 came from the woman in front of me who threw up her hands and cheered every time someone got killed. First of all, I’m glad that the bunnies from The Favourite got more work. Second of all, I hope Lupita Nyong’o isn’t forgotten during awards season because she deserves several trophies for her (SPOILER ALERT) impeccable voice impersonation of Elizabeth Holmes with dry mouth – A.V. Club

Jon Hamm took the Hammaconda (not pictured) out for a night on the town – Lainey Gossip

Alanis Morrissette and Souleye made another baby, so prepare for a baby name that sounds like a cross between an indica strain and a Hunger Games character – SOW

The tears of gays is still the secret ingredient in Chick-fil-A’s chicken batter  – Pajiba

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