Category: Swift Justice

Taylor Swift’s Website Had To Post A “Care Notice” Because Of Complaints About Her Tour Merch Fading After Washing

April 6, 2023 / Posted by:

Since many of Taylor Swift’s fans’ faces undoubtedly sported a “distressed, vintage look” after hoping to receive early access, waiting hours in a virtual queue on Ticketmaster, encountering the dreaded rainbow wheel, or getting kicked out of the queue entirely during site crashes, and then MAYBE getting to shell out several hundreds or thousands of dollars for tickets to one of her coveted 3-hour long, 44-song setlist Eras Tour shows; they were probably less than thrilled that the overpriced souvenirs they grabbed as evidence of their valiant, transcendent journey also started sporting a “distressed, vintage look” after only a single wash. Apparently, so many fans expressed disappointment with the lacking longevity of the printing on the tour apparel they purchased that Taylor’s official website issued a “care notice,” which basically said, “We meant for that to happen.”

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Jake Gyllenhaal Kind Of Addressed Being Cyberbullied By Taylor Swift Fans

February 17, 2022 / Posted by:

Ms. Fluffle Stilt Skins did what she could, but it seems her plaintive mews asking Taylor Swift fans to “calm down and stop cyber bullyingJake Gyllenhaal fell on deaf ears. And if they won’t listen to a cat, it sounds like the only person they might take direction from is Taylor herself. That’s kind of what Jake hinted at in a new profile in Esquire where he spoke for the first time about being targeted by Swifties who are apparently still irate with him for allegedly leaving Taylor on read after their brief but stunt-filled relationship which ended back in 2010. Taylor retaliated by writing her 2012 hit song All Too Well then threw kerosene on the flames when she released a 10-minute version which she included on her re-recorded album Red (Taylor’s Version), causing Swifties to run roughshod all up in his Instagram comments anew.

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Jake Gyllenhaal’s Rumored Cat, Ms. Fluffle Stilt Skin, Has Spoken Up On His Behalf

November 17, 2021 / Posted by:

Ms. Fluffle Stilt Skins has spoken! Ok well, she’s meouched. Jake Gyllenhaal’s unofficial spokescat has issued a statement on Instagram pleading “ya’ll need to calm down and stop cyber bullying.” And I think we know, all too well, who “y’all” is here. While a source tells E! News that Jake doesn’t “read gossip” and has “no interest in it,” Jake himself hasn’t publicly commented on the renewed vitriol coming his way from Taylor Swift fans since the release of Red (Taylor’s Version) version of All Too Well (10-Minute Version) with an accompanying music video directed by Taylor herself. But Ms. Fluffle isn’t afraid to let her 44.5K followers know there will be no Jake slander tolerated on HER interwebs! Now, you may be wondering why and how Jake has come to have an official spokescat, even though he’s allergic. Well, the answer is simple. The internet is a vast and ponderous place where tear-stained pussies wield the power of Gods.

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Taylor Swift’s New 10 Minute Version Of “All Too Well” Has People Mad At Jake Gyllenhaal All Over Again

November 12, 2021 / Posted by:

When I saw Jake Gynnhaal trending on Twitter last night I braced for the worst. And reader, I was not wrong to do so. Jake Gyllenhaal was dating Taylor Swift. Thank god it happened 10 years ago but still, what were you thinking? I had forgotten how mad the Swifties were at Jake when the song All Too Well debuted on Taylor’s 2012 album Red. But because the only villain in the Taylorverse more dastardly than Jake is Scooter Braun, Taylor’s rerecording all her old albums. And so, with the release of Red (Taylor’s Version) last night, the internet is crawling up Jake’s ass anew for allegedly popping Taylor’s cherry before ghosting her on her 21st birthday as suggested in the lyrics of All Too Well (10 Minute Version: This Time It’s Even More Personal).

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