Things Dean Sheremet Has Learned: LeAnn Rimes Doesn’t Like It When You Talk About Her In Your Cook Book

The final nail (Eddie Cibrian’s penis) was hammered into the coffin of LeAnn Rimes and Dean Sheremet’s marriage way way back in 2009. Since then, Dean keeps finding new ways to bring up her name and remind us all that he was once the Jennifer Aniston to LeAnn and Eddie’s Lifetime-budget Brangelina. The most recent of which has been writing about his dead relationship with LeAnn in a new cook book called Eat Your Heart Out.

You’d think a shameless attention whore like LeAnn would respect Dean’s hustle, but no. Unfortunately for Dean, LeAnn wasn’t a fan of such a tacky stunt, and InTouch says she released her lawyers on him. Dean tells InTouch he received a letter from LeAnn’s lawyers about a week before the release of Eat Your Heart Out on February 8th reminding him about the Marital Settlement Agreement he signed in 2009 and warned him to keep his mouth shut.

The letter also states that LeAnn’s lawyers didn’t pursue legal action when he ran his mouth off about their marriage last year. But they decided to get involved this time because it sounded like his cook book might spill some confidential information and violate the terms of their agreement. And if the Amazon description is any indication, yeah, it probably does.

The letter goes on to say that LeAnn doesn’t want to come between Dean and a check, but she will if that money is made by dragging her name through a recipe for chicken tetrazzini.

In reponse to LeAnn’s letter, Dean folded his arms, rolled his eyes, and hissed at LeAnn for making this all about herself.

“I just don’t get it. She already killed my happiness the first time around. [It’s like], ‘Move on already, LeAnn. I’ve moved on!'”

Dean then added: “I’m on people’s radar because of my past with her. I can’t erase my past; I referred to it and was very respectful. I’m not the one who cheated.” Did you hear that, LeAnn? He’s over it, okay! And if you need any more information on just how over it he is, please turn to the chapter in his cook book titled: Meals To Cook For Yourself While Your Wife Is Out Banging Eddie Cibrian.

Pic: Wenn.com

Eddie Cibrian Calls Brandi Glanville A Liar, Brandi Glanville Bashes His Ass Before Calling A Truce

On Tuesday, I linked to a Reality Tea piece about how Brandi Glanville continued to slap at her ex-husband Eddie Cibrian and his luck dragon bride LeAnn Rimes during an interview on a podcast. Brandi said that it hurts her in the heart area when LeAnn posts pictures of her sons on Instagram. Brandi claimed that she’s begged LeAnn to stop posting the pictures but Falkor doesn’t care and has kept on, kept on.. Here’s a piece of what came out of Brandi’s mouth:

“I have an issue with her posting pictures of my children on holidays. It’s horrible. If my ex-husband, their dad, isn’t posting pictures – why is she? I’ll grab three bottles of chardonnay, cry myself to sleep and look at what they’re doing for Christmas. It’s hell.”

Like Brandi wasn’t planning on downing three bottles of chardonnay that night anyway. Eddie Cibrian usually keeps his lips shut about these things and lets his sugar mama luck dragon do the barking for him, but not this time.

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Open Post: Hosted By The Demure Elegance Of “BatBitch”

Presenting, BatSlut, the superhero who defeats her haters by busting out some graceful poses. She’ll hit you with thirty tons of elegance and make you hit the floor by filling your nostrils with a lacy fart. I bet this is still better than Ben Affleck’s Batman and that was served without one drop of sarcasm. And hmmm, where have I seen that pose before?

Life & Style threw a Halloween party in L.A. last night, and obviously it brought out the shiniest and biggest stars in the A-list universe. “Did I stumble into the Oscars without knowing it?” is what one party ho was heard saying after they laid eyes on Natalie Nunn from the Bad Girls Club (seen above as BatBitch) and two ex-Real Housewives. Life & Style’s Halloween party wasn’t just a gathering of the finest jewels in Hollywood, it was also where Backdoor Farrah debuted her third pair of silicone titty sacks. I find it hard to believe that Backdoor Farrah just got a boob job recently, because it looks like she finally said “fuck it” and told her plastic surgeon to replace any natural parts on her body with man-made materials. Backdoor Farrah’s blow-up doll looks more natural and alive than she does.

And here’s more pictures of the party where LeAnn Rimes was the biggest “star” there.

Pics: Splash, Wenn.com

LeAnn Rimes And Eddie Cibrian Are Allegedly Broke And Owe Their Friends $350,000

I’d make a joke about Brandi Glanville laughing manically as she repeatedly pokes a pin in the wallet area of her Eddie Cibrian voodood doll, but that unemployed troublemaker is in no position to be laughing at anyone’s financial situation. But back to Eddie and his Spitting Image puppet-looking wife LeAnn Rimes. Eddie and LeAnn are allegedly so broke that they have been forced to beg their friends for money. Except it’s not like a “Can I borrow $20?” kind of thing, it’s more like a “Can you loan me a couple hundred thousand dollars” friendship-killing kind of thing.

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Dean Sheremet Thinks The Dumbest Thing LeAnn Rimes Did For Her Career Was Leaving Him For Eddie Cibrian

LeAnn Rimes first husband Dean Sheremet is back for some reason, and he’s got lots of things to say about his luck dragon-looking ex-wife and her life choices. I just imagined Dean screaming “LOOK AT YOUR CHOICES!” and LeAnn responding “I can’t, my eyes are too squinty” and yeah, it made me laugh out loud. Thanks, hardcore prescription antihistamines.

Even though a coroner called the official time of death on Dean and LeAnn’s marriage back in 2009, Dean is still talking about his relationship with the unofficial cultural attaché to fold-up soccer chairs, and this time it was with Nat’s Next Adventure (via E!). I guess Dean moonlights as an amateur phone psychic, because he seems to think that LeAnn would still be an A-list country singer and not a failed reality star if she hadn’t left him for Eddie Cibrian:

“The dumbest thing she ever did for her career was divorce me, because we were such a good team. The last hit song she had was when she was with me.”

He then added that he’s still surprised LeAnn was able to successfully cheat on his ass, because they pretty much shared a cellphone:

“There were things she couldn’t do without me. She had her own phone but never used it. People would call me to get to her. Everything went through me.”

He also threw a little not-so-subtle shade at the Lifetime masterpiece where LeAnn and Eddie’s skanky home-wrecking love first blossomed, Northern Lights:

“It’s funny, I don’t remember seeing that on my SAG screeners that year. The funny thing is I’m the one who pushed her to do that movie.”

Dean Sheremet receives SAG screeners? Sure, Jan. Dean also has thoughts about LeAnn trying to be famous and how she’s “gone away from what she was put on this earth to do”. Um, I’m sorry Dean, but I’m pretty sure if you asked God, he’d say he put LeAnn Rimes on this earth to get into messy Twitter fights with Brandi Glanville.

File Under “Opposite Of Shocking”: LeAnn Rimes And Eddie Cibrian’s Reality Show Got Cancelled

Cue the sound of Brandi Glanville joyfully cackling at the top of her lungs. “You may be younger and prettier, bitch, but at least I’m still on television!” According to People, the reason Brandi is breaking all the fillers in her face in an attempt to smile is because VH1 has cancelled LeAnn Rimes and Eddie Cibrian’s reality show, LeAnn & Eddie after one season and eight episodes. Oh no! Now how will LeAnn convince us Eddie is still totally in love with her and definitely not eye-fucking the exit?

People says VH1 had no comment on the cancellation, but I bet it had something to do with LeAnn & Eddie being boring as hell. I only watched one episode, and I went in to it assuming it was going to be filled with squint-eyed dragon drama and smug-faced douche theatrics, and it was not. LeAnn & Eddie was supposed to be eight episodes of LeAnn accusing Eddie of cheating on her with some random chick he met at an audition for a Verizon commercial and Eddie accusing LeAnn of being a drunk mess in front of his kids. Instead we got coma-inducing scenes of LeAnn rearranging the furniture in her living room. Even her dogs seemed to be looking at the camera like “Wait, you’re filming this? Why?”

Besides, there’s only enough room on television for one scripted reality show about a skinny blonde attention whore with Tupperware titties and her unemployed beady-eyed bangaholic husband, and that’s True Tori.

Here’s LeAnn strolling through LAX yesterday wearing a pair of fancy-looking pajama bottoms aka what I’d consider my “good” grocery shopping pants:

Pics: Wenn.com