Surprise! Ryan Gosling And Rachel McAdams Hated Each Other On The Set Of “The Notebook”

I know this isn’t BREAKING NEWS!!1! for all of you die-hard The Notebook fans, because I’m pretty sure this story has maybe been told before, but for the rest of us who haven’t ever gone to Notebook-Con dressed as the rowboat, then this is new. In honor of the 10th anniversary of the movie that can make your sad aunt start bawling her eyes out just by spotting the DVD on the shelf, director Nick Cassavetes told VH1 about how Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams would have rather been forced to watch The Hot Chick and Breaker High, Ludovico-style, than spend longer than 3 seconds with each other’s asses:

“Maybe I’m not supposed to tell this story, but they were really not getting along one day on set. Really not. And Ryan came to me, and there’s 150 people standing in this big scene, and he says, ‘Nick come here.’ And he’s doing a scene with Rachel and he says, ‘Would you take her out of here and bring in another actress to read off camera with me?’ I said, ‘What?’ He says, ‘I can’t. I can’t do it with her. I’m just not getting anything from this.'”

“We went into a room with a producer; they started screaming and yelling at each other. I walked out. At that point I was smoking cigarettes. I smoked a cigarette and everybody came out like, ‘All right let’s do this.’ And it got better after that, you know? They had it out… I think Ryan respected her for standing up for her character and Rachel was happy to get that out in the open. The rest of the film wasn’t smooth sailing, but it was smoother sailing.”

Who knew soft-spoken Canadian dreamboat Ryan Gosling could be such a diva bitch? Sure, Rachel McAdams took acting lessons at the lumber yard (bitch is wooden) but it’s The Notebook; it’s basically a Lifetime movie with enough cash in the budget for a craft services table. But I guess Ryan Gosling didn’t get the memo, because that difficult baby goose acted like they were filming the 1940’s prequel to Blue Valentine or some shit.

And you know that what Nick Cassavetes really wanted to say was: “Thank god those two trailered-up and got to hate-fucking, because old timey costumes don’t come cheap.” 

Eva Mendes And Rachel McAdams Are About To Do A Real-Life Duet Of “The Boy Is Mine”

The extremely accurate and beacon of one hundred percent potent truthiness Now Magazine says that Eva Mendes has temporarily put aside her evil plan to take down the Power Rangers and is instead pointing her Orb of Doom at that Gosling-stealing, two-bit hussy whore Rachel McAdams. A source (aka a drunk intern who also runs the We Hate Evil Menses Tumblr on the side) tells Now that ever since Rachel McAdams broke up with Michael Sheen, she’s been wiping her heartbroken tears on the shoulder of her ex-piece Ryan Gosling. Eva, whose right eyebrow always looks like it’s in the “bitch, step back” position, is really raising her eyebrow in the “bitch, step back” position, because she wants Rachel McAdams to step away from her man.

Apparently, Rachel and Ryan stayed friends and talked every now and again when she was with Michael Sheen, but now that she’s single they’ve been talking on the phone even more. The source said, “Rachel’s always kept in touch with Ryan, but now that she’s split with Michael, she’s been calling him and using him as a shoulder to cry on. It hasn’t gone down very well with Eva, to say the least, but Ryan wants to be there as a friend for his ex.”

Well, since the LeAnn Rimes/Eddie Cibrian/Brandi Glanville feud is the bottom shelf version of the Angelina Jolie/Brad Pitt/Jennifer Aniston feud, we needed a middle shelf version too and here it is. This is something to keep hope alive for those McGosling fans who think The Notebook is real-life and Ryan and Rachel will be sucking rain water off of each other’s faces in the end. Ain’t no love like Canadian love.

This shit probably isn’t true, but it still makes for the perfect triangle. Rachel McAdams is a wholesome-looking white angel with golden hair like a melted halo and Eva looks like an 80s soap opera villainess who can steal your man and half of your company in one day. I mean, she even dresses like Alexis Carrington (see: pictures of her outside of Letterman below). So that is why I will always wear a Team Eva t-shirt from Kitson (do they still sell that shit?).

Rachel McAdams And Michael Sheen Broke Up Too

I can’t believe this is the first time I’m noticing this, but Michael Sheen’s hair is so luxurious. The top of his head is full of luxurious waves of hair crashing into each other. It almost steals the picture from that woman in the back with the immaculate Moses-parted hairline. Almost. So, the American Carey Mulligan and her puppet humper broke up recently and I guess that put something in the air, because Rachel McAdams and Michael Sheen broke up too. My thoughts are with Rachel McAdams’ fingers, because they will never run themselves through the sumptuous forest of locks on Michael Sheen’s head again!

UsWeekly says that after 2 years together, Rachel and Michael broke up very recently. They met while doing that Woody Allen movie, they became friends, they humped on each other for a while and now they’re over.

Eva Mendes will be walking around L.A. today with a stick of burning sage in her hand, because she knows the Notebook fangirls will be blowing break-up juju her way. They won’t be able to unclench their b-holes until Ryan Gosling dumps Eva and reunites with Rachel McAdams, because that’s the way it was meant to be.

Whatever, while they blow break-up juju toward Eva, I’ll sit here and get lost in Michael Sheen’s hair. I bet that when a lice lands on his cheek and makes the epic journey up his 500 mile-long desert of skin forehead and spots his gorgeous hair in the distance, it’s like looking at Shangri-La. Perfection.

Rose Boy Is Still At It

When Megan Fox crushed the vulnerable heart of a young boy by ignoring his “PLEASE LOVE ME” plea, he didn’t crawl under his bottom bunk and permanently retire his dream of getting at least one celebrity to NOTICE HIM. Harvey Kindlon got back out there! The Daily Mail did a story on Harvey and he later got a picture with Lady CaCa.

But now that Harvey’s a couple of years older, he’s smoothed out his game. Harvey has cut his hair, bought a pair of pants, donated the peach shirt to a Camp Beverly Hills collector and is no longer looking like a Goonies extra. Harvey has even dropped the rose act. Harvey stalked Rachel McAdams the other night and he didn’t even bring her a weed flower. Nothing. Rachel doesn’t even know he’s alive, but Harvey doesn’t seem to mind. If he’s about to shrivel into a dehydrated moth ball of lonely tears, he’s doing a good job of masking that feeling with his facial expression. Just like an adult! Aw. Our little creeper is growing up!

Get A TSA Screening Room!

Here’s Rachel McAdams and Michael Sheen giving each a TSA screening at LAX yesterday while a security dude walked by and thought to himself, “I’d pat it, the both of ’em.”

But seriously, when Rachel McAdams is in love, homegirl is in love. You can practically see the cartoon birds fluttering around her and whispering in her ear in a sing song-ey voice, “He’s the one. He’s the oooone.” Right after this kiss, I bet Rachel skipped into a stall in the bathroom, fell against the door, clutched her heart and sighed one of those I’M IN LOOOOOVE kind of sighs. Just like she does in those stupid ass romantic comedies she’s in. When Rachel was with Ryan Gosling, it was the same shit! Their pupils were always heart-shaped and shit. Girl goes in something serious.

Meanwhile, if a boyfriend tells me he loves me in public, I scream “EWWWW” and run away to exfoliate the cooties off in the sandbox.

Rachel McAdams And Michael Sheen Are Kind Of A Thing Now

During the Toronto Film Festival last month, Lainey at Lainey Gossip wrote about how she watched 31-year-old Rachel McAdams and 41-year-old Michael Sheen flirt with each other at a party before leaving together (see above). I figured that the two simply went back to his hotel room where they giggled in bed for a while (they are definitely sex gigglers).

Then the next morning, they shared more laughs over plates of hotel eggs when Rachel said that she could never eat an egg as a child because she thought a yolk was a blended up chick. That’s totally a story she would tell. Oh, they laughed at that. Before she left, Rachel handed Michael the white button down shirt of his she wore during breakfast and apologized for getting a little strawberry jam on it. They laughed at that too. THEY LAUGH AT EVERYTHING! Rachel finally turned around, walked out the door and smiled like a fat baby farting as she skipped down the hallway. Cue a Motown song. The End. Or is it?!

The National Post (via Page Six) says that their story has continued! Columnist Shinan Govani says that Rachel and Michael have been holding hands and LAUGHING all over Toronto for the past month. One ho who had brunch next to Michael and Rachel at Gilead Cafe said, “Their happiness is making my day.”

Barf on a puddle of barf. “Their happiness is making my day”? Whoever said that must’ve eaten paper for brunch and stared at a matte white wall the rest of the day if Rachel and Michael LAUGHING together was the high point of their day.

I mean, only characters in a Rodgers & Hammerstein musical say shit like that! And they sing it, so it’s totally different! That quote totally ruined my day.