The new remake of the 1951 John Huston classic, The African Queen, that starred Katharine Hepburn and Humphrey Bogart finally has a trailer. For some reason they’re calling it Jungle Cruise and it stars Emily Blunt and The Rock. It does make me wonder though. It’s a Disney movie, and coincidentally, there just so happens to be a ride at Disneyland called Jungle Cruise. It’s almost too on the nose. Could it be that it’s not a coincidence at all? Nah! There’s no way in hell they’d try to make an entire movie based on the flimsy premise of a lazy river from which a dusty hippopotamus sprays stagnant pond water on a boatload of sunburnt tourists. Sure, they did make all those Pirates of The Caribbean movies, but those only grossed a measly $5 billion worldwide! Surely Disney wouldn’t attempt the same folly twice!
According to Deadline, the family of Gianni Versace have released a statement denouncing Ryan Murphy’s latest scandal-based television offering. Needless to say, they won’t be throwing an The Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story viewing party in their mansion when it premieres next week.
If you’ve been following the making of Ryan Murphy’s latest bewigged dramatic extravaganza, The Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story, then you’ve probably already seen Darren Criss (Andrew Cunan), Edgar Ramirez (Gianni Versace), Penelope Cruz (Donatella Versace) and Ricky Martin (Gianni’s partner Antonio D’Amico) in character. But Entertainment Weekly got the first official picture of all of them together. That cover is a tacky, opulent 90s fever dream of Day-Glo messiness, and yes I’m going to force my family to recreate it for our 2017 Christmas card, and we don’t even do family Christmas cards! And yes, hair will be pulled and faces will be scratched as we fight over who gets to be the “Donatella.”