All Aboard! Disney’s First “Jungle Cruise” Trailer Has Arrived

The new remake of the 1951 John Huston classic, The African Queen, that starred Katharine Hepburn and Humphrey Bogart finally has a trailer. For some reason they’re calling it Jungle Cruise and it stars Emily Blunt and The Rock. It does make me wonder though. It’s a Disney movie, and coincidentally, there just so happens to be a ride at Disneyland called Jungle Cruise. It’s almost too on the nose. Could it be that it’s not a coincidence at all? Nah! There’s no way in hell they’d try to make an entire movie based on the flimsy premise of a lazy river from which a dusty hippopotamus sprays stagnant pond water on a boatload of sunburnt tourists. Sure, they did make all those Pirates of The Caribbean movies, but those only grossed a measly $5 billion worldwide! Surely Disney wouldn’t attempt the same folly twice!

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