There’s been many hot takes on the recent uprising of voices speaking out against powerful men in the entertainment industry. And then there’s Morrissey’s take on it all. Last week, Morrissey gave an interview to Germany’s Der Spiegel in which he defended Harvey Weinstein and Kevin Spacey , calling the allegations “ridiculous” and victim blaming. He also shrugged off the allegations against Kevin Spacey by saying, “If you go through history, almost everyone is guilty of sleeping with minors.”
Morrissey recently returned to the well of sexual assault allegations and pumped out some more stagnant puddle thoughts.
It’s been two days since the terrorist attack at an Ariana Grande concert at the Manchester Arena is Manchester that killed 22 people and injured 59, and since then it feels like there’s been no end to the public outpouring of support for the victims and their families, messages of strength, and helpers looking to help. Just a quick glance at Twitter or Facebook shows that a whole lot of people have thoughts about what happened. Most of them are the good kind of thoughts. But yesterday Morrissey hopped on Facebook and gave his thoughts on the attack, and of course it’s the definition of “Now is not the time, Morrissey.”
Morrissey posted a written tribute to Prince on his fan site True-To-You, and being the cat lover he is, you’d think that he’d slap at Jehovah’s Sexiest Witness for tearin’ up so many pussies. But Morrissey applauded Prince for not eating animal stuff. Morrissey was also mad that in England, Prince’s death was overshadowed by THE QUEEN’s 90th birthday extravaganza. Morrissey’s Prince tribute isn’t so much a Prince tribute as it is slap down against the British royals. It’s as if Morrissey got on the stage and said, “I am here to pay tribute to the beloved Prince,” before pulling out a replica of THE QUEEN’s crown and then shitting on it. It’s 100% Morrissey, it’s 100% messy and I love it. You really can’t spell Morrissey without M-E-S-S-Y. It’s after the cut.
King and Queen of all things grumpy, hateful and bitter, Morrissey, is possibly considering running for mayor of London. Don’t tell him I called him King and Queen because you know how he feels about the monarchy, but I cannot tell a lie and that is what he is. His kingdom, unlike the Queen’s, is all eyeliner emo kids eating vegan snackpacks while they cry about their hair straighteners not working or something and soon, that very well could become part of the Queen’s kingdom.
Hardcore Morrissey fans always wearing black and a black veil, because they permanently have the Emos since they’re hardcore Morrissey fans. But today, they’re putting a second black veil over their black veil, because Morrissey has announced that his next two shows in London may be his last shows in the UK for the rest of eternity. Morrissey is always being extra melodramatic and he’s said shit like this many times before. So Morrissey may just be pulling a Morrissey. He doesn’t have a record label in the UK anymore and he isn’t working on a new album, so he doesn’t think there’s any point in touring. Morrissey left this message on one of his fansites:
“There is absolutely no way that we can generate any interest from record labels in the United Kingdom, therefore the imminent two nights at Hammersmith are likely to be our final ever UK shows. We are obsessively grateful for all interest and loyalty from our audience … throughout 28 years … but without new releases, there is no point in any additional touring. Thank you for so many absolutely incredible times. The pleasure and privilege is mine … “
Tickets are still available for at least one of his shows, so this could be a STUNT. I wouldn’t be surprised if in a year or so, Morrissey announces new shows in London and dramatically says that they will be his last for real, because he just can’t go on anymore.
The Guardian says that Morrissey was dropped by his label Harvest Records last year and he hasn’t been able to find a new home for his music. Morrissey claims that every record label he’s tried to get with has turned him down. Nobody wants his ass. Hmmm… I wonder why record labels don’t want Morrissey. I wonder if someone sent a messenger Corgi to every record label in the UK with a note warning them that they will be tried for treason if they sign that traitor. I wonder….
Game point goes to THE QUEEN!
Pics: Wenn.com, Getty
Grumpy glum cunt Morrissey is back for another episode of “Yes, Morrissey Hates Life More Than You Do.” Morrissey is flipping off the clouds and slapping the wind while touring the US and to promote his show in Colorado, the British ball of vegan bitterness decided to give his thoughts on the current state of music while talking to Boulder Weekly. Of course, his thoughts on the current state of music are certified bitchy and I love it. Morrissey believes that the mainstream music industry is just a backed-up toilet that keeps spewing out more and more shit. Morrissey thinks that everybody is over-marketed and the likes of slut-shaming crooner Sam Smith and jolly Hobbit Ed Sheeran are only big because their labels force fed their music into our ear holes. Tell it, Morrissey!
“There are no bands or singers who become successful without overwhelming marketing. There are no surprise success stories. Everything is stringently controlled, obvious and predictable and has exactly the same content. So, we are now in the era of marketed pop stars, which means that the labels fully control the charts, and consequently the public has lost interest. It’s very rare that a record label does something for the good of music. Thus we are force-fed such as Ed Sheeran and Sam Smith, which at least means that things can’t possibly get any worse. It is sad, though. There’s no spontaneity now, and it all seems to be unsalvageable.”
Out of all the singers he could’ve labeled as “crap” he goes with Sam Smith and Ed Sheeran? Okay.
I’m with Morrissey on a couple of things, but he lost me at “no surprise success stories.” Has Morrissey never heard of Susan Boyle who was plucked from a cat fur-covered sofa and turned into a not-at-all-controlled-or-marketed star?! Also, Morrissey should brace himself, because mainstream music can get a lot worse. I mean, Iggy Azalea is coming out with a new album next year.
Anyway, now you can go ahead and add Sam Smith’s music and Ed Sheeran’s music to the never-ending list of things that Morrissey can’t stand. You know what? At this point it’s probably just easier to write “EVERYTHING” over that list and call it a day.