If there’s one thing that MIGHT give Leonardo DiCaprio the tingles more than humping on a fresh crop of under 25-year-old models, it’s trying to save the environment while riding in a private jet or whatever. I already knew Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin were friends with Leo because I’m mental and “read” her first cookbook (aka looked at the pictures and snickered at a few ludicrous recipes) and saw how she claims he’s the reason for them not really eating red meat for environmental reasons. Well, “consciously uncoupled” Chris must still be platonic boos with Leo because Coldplay performed at the Leonardo DiCaprio Foundation’s 20thanniversary gala on Saturday, and Chris used that as a moment to discuss how Leo is also out to save a species the fashion world would love to see go extinct – no, not Dress Barn. Cargo shorts!
Uh huh… Leonardo DiCaprio Is Supposedly Talking About Marriage With His Current 21-Year-Old Girlfriend
It’s been a whole 8 months since 43-year-old Leonardo DiCarpio started dating 21-year-old Camila Morrone and things are getting so serious guys. I mean, this man took her to Coachella and stuck with her for the whole fucking thing, and then he took her on vacation with his own mom. That’s huge! In Leonardo DiCaprio world this girl already deserves a divorce settlement!
You might as well clutch your My Buddy doll (or 80s toy of your choice) to your chest, crawl back inside your mother, and pretend you’ve never been born. Because it’s been announced that Sony Pictures TV, along with Leonardo DiCaprio and Jessica Biel’s production companies, are in the early stages of giving The Facts of Life the reboot treatment.
When an initial photograph of Leonardo DiCaprio and Brad Pitt was released from that Sharon Tate movie Quentin Tarantino’s directing that nobody asked for, some of us got it confused and thought it was a still for a 70’s gay porn film and got excited. OK, maybe that was just me, but I digress. Well, I may not have been off the mark by too much, because Gus Van Sant is talking about how he was initially pitched to direct Brokeback Mountain and was trying to get Brad and Leo to be the ones to play hide the salami in the Wyoming wilderness. Continue reading
Sharon Tate’s sister just found a new favorite picture to wipe her post-shit ass with….
The Quentin Tarantino Manson Murders movie, that nobody but those involved want, is currently shooting in Los Angeles, and to give us a little sneak peek of the foolery that will be bestowed upon us when this shit comes out next year, Leonardo DiCatchAHo posted this picture on Instagram of himself and Brad Pitt as western actor Rick Dalton and Rick’s stunt double. Okay, but if Brad is going to be somebody’s stunt double, he looks like 50-something Robert Redford’s stunt double. Brad Pitt is trying to be Robert Redford so bad that he’s close to shitting out some Newman’s Own popcorn. Oh wait, that’s Paul Newman. I guess all hot white movie star dudes from the olden days look the same to me.
Leonardo on the other hand… It’s amazing what a Silkwood shower, a Hazmat spray down, an industrial-strength comb, the best Petco groomers in the country, man Spanx, and a beard machete can do. Leo is looking good, and I’m sure nobody is happier than his young piece of the moment, because she was probably sick of getting flea bites on her lips every time she went down on him.
Once Upon a Time in Hollywood also stars Margot Robbie (as Sharon Tate), Dakota Fanning (as Squeaky Fromme), Al Pacino, James Marsden, Kurt Russell, Damian Lewis (as Steve McQueen), Timothy Olyphant, Burt Reynolds, Michael Madsen, Zoe Bell, Tim Roth, Emile Hirsch, and Luke Perry.
You know, there is a reason why this movie exists. It exists to give Brad Pitt and Leonardo DiCaprio the opportunity to apologize to Luke Perry for having the careers he should have! Justice 4 Luke Perry!
Back in March, Tiffany Haddish told a story about being at a party, where she watched a drugged-up actress hit on Jay-Z and then try to bite her lord and savior Beyoncé in the face. It didn’t take the internet long to guess it was Sanaa Lathan, who denied she was the biter by calling the rumor “absurd.” Tiffany claimed she couldn’t spill the beans because she was bound by an NDA. The NDA clearly only specified disclosure by way of talking, and not facial gestures. Tiffany has pulled the curtain back, and Beyoncé’s alleged face-biter is none other than who you all thought it was.