Leonardo DiCaprio already has one Oscar that he lovingly kisses on the forehead each night before he retires to a pile of 23-year-old models. But it looks like he wants to add a second one to his shelf (ah, the ultimate threesome: Leo and two Oscars). Deadline reports that Leo will be working on a biopic about former US President, face on Mount Rushmore, and bushy mustache wilderness guy Theodore Roosevelt. Finally, an excuse for Leo to stay pudgy and scruffy after yacht season!
It wasn’t that long ago that Leonardo DiCaprio was working his way, one by one, through the nation’s supply of underwear models. Then it appeared he had reached the end of all the models and was starting back at one’s he’s already wined, dined, and sixty-oned (it’s where a lazy Leo pretends to participate in a 69, but he just ends up laying there like a slug). Last week Leo was seen on a date with Toni Garrn. A few days before he was seen on a date with a newer model Lorena Rae.
This picture of Leonardo DiCaprio pondering pensively has nothing to do with this story. But I like to think this is the same way he looks when he’s going through his old girlfriends and seeing which ones might get a repeat appearance in his life. “Lukas, show me the next list. I’d like blondes from 2013-2014. Let’s start with the first quarter, and can you list them by Victoria’s Secret catalogue appearances? Thank you, Lukas.”
It’s AMAZING what you can find on Google by merely typing in “bad Joker cosplay.” Hollywood is desperately trying to forget Jared Leto’s portrayal of the Joker as an annoying Manic Panic addict with a melanin deficiency in the execrable Suicide Squad. Warner Bros. is trying to make a Todd Phillips-directed origin story for the Joker, and Martin Scorsese is reportedly on board to executive-produce it (!!!) in hopes of a quality, classy production. Both Variety and The Hollywood Reporter are claiming that they want Victoria’s Secret model vetter and frequent Scorsese collaborator Leonardo DiCaprio in the lead. This flick was supposed to feature a “young” pre-Joker. Have they changed the synopsis to a forty-something dude who decides to bedevil Batman as a solution to his midlife crisis? Continue reading
And we’re not talking pussycat! Vanity Fair has this giant volume on the history of Gossip Girl to commemorate the tenth anniversary from when it first aired. If you read it, you’d think it got M*A*S*H* kind of ratings instead of being the CW’s first swing at the television piñata. You’d also think it should have been called BLAKE LIVELY!!! (and a bunch of nobody teen actors). They really focus in on Blake.
There are several universal truths. Cats and dogs fight. As does the cast of Real Housewives of… wherever. And Leonardo DiCaprio likes to stick his peen in blonde models. It’s just how the world goes ’round! Only, Page Six just served up some “the world is square” shit, because it appears Leo has gone for a…BRUNETTE?!?!?! Hoo, honey, suddenly the phone line at every Supercuts in the country has gone busy, because every ho in town is rushing to get a cheap and easy dye job! Continue reading