Back in June John Boyega made headlines when he gave an impassioned, impromptu speech at a Black Lives Matter protest in London. In it, he said, “I don’t know if I’m going to have a career after this, but fuck that.” Celebs like Jordan Peele, Olivia Wilde, and his Star Wars director JJ Abrams took to Twitter to assure John that they’d still love to work with him.
Now, John’s continuing that honesty streak in a new interview with GQ. He discusses Black Lives Matter, his personal journey to self-actualization, and being a Black actor in the Star Wars franchise. He says that he, along with other actors of color like Naomi Ackie, Kelly Marie Tran, and even Oscar Isaac (whom John refers to as “a brother from Guatemala”), were trotted out to sell the movies, but sidelined in the actual films.
Well you’ve done it. Because everyone thought that Baby Yoda was so cute and was cashing in on that shit, now we have Baby Jabba, as in Baby Jabba the Hutt, that disgusting slug who held up women in chains and bikinis. Fuck that kid, I say. And lucky for us he’s not official, as this is just the brain child of some artist trying to curse us with more shit we don’t need. …For now…
Just like when Avengers: End Game introduced its first gay character in the form of a momentary part of dialogue where a guy mentions he went on a date with another man (scandalous…), Star Wars is trying to also lightly season its universe with the gays. It’s been revealed that the newest movie, Star Wars: The Rise Of Skywalker will feature the franchise’s first same-sex kiss, because J.J. Abrams loves the LGBTQ community. Okay, he loves us within reason; stop thinking that Poe and Finn get together. If you think two people in that screen grab above are going to kiss, you’d have better luck being right if one of them is Chewbacca.
If you’re a Star Wars purist, you might be the type of person who separates the films into two categories, BC (Before Corporate Sellout) and AD (After Disney). And clearly there are some people who favor one side to the other. Me personally? I’m only interested if Baby Yoda is involved. George Lucas sold the Star Wars universe to Disney in 2012 for $4 billion, and it didn’t take him very long to start talking shit about the first post-Disney film, Star Wars: The Force Awakens when it was released in 2015. George didn’t like it then, he still doesn’t like it now. J.J. Abrams, director and screenwriter of The Force Awakens, has had just about enough of George’s hateration and holleration in this spacery.
If you’ve spent any time at all on Cher’s internet this week, you’ve probably seen the Baby Yoda that makes an appearance in the pilot episode of the Disney+ Star Wars show, The Mandalorian by now. Baby Yoda is the breakout star of 2019 and his adorableness has got many grown adults all up in their feelings. That includes Wener Herzog. It turns out that in addition to Kim Kardashian’s ass, puppet babies are very much his kink (intellectually, of course). In an interview for Variety, Werner says seeing Baby Yoda on set made him cry, calling the little guy “heartbreakingly beautiful”. And please remember, despite starring in a Star Wars TV show, Werner’s never even seen a Star Wars movie before!
One might assume that famed German documentarian Werner Herzog’s tastes probably skew pretty highbrow. I mean he’s an 77-year-old award-winning filmmaker, and he has an accent! It’s not like he’s the type of guy to be staying up late at night watching WrestleMania and Keeping Up With The Kardashians. However, according to a new interview in Variety, that’s exactly the type of guy he is. Only while he’s doing it, he’s also pondering the cultural significance of the vulgarity before his eyes and measuring the impact of Kim’s ass against the fiery miasma of a world shifting meteorite as it plunges to Earth, laden as it is, in its essential molecules, with the hopes and dreams and an alien race we shall never meet. At least I think that’s what he said.