Category: Shhhhhhhh!

Lena Dunham Got Dragged For Tweeting That She Wants Her Coffin Driven Through NYC Pride

October 3, 2022 / Posted by:

Look up foot-in-mouth disease in the encyclopedia, and you’ll find a picture of Lena Dunham. The #1 symptom? Saying really dumb shit. Last year, 36-year-old Lena blamed some of her more ignorant moments on being young and having “huge blind spots.” And since she’s (mostly) stepped out of the spotlight these past few years, she hasn’t had a ton of public FIM flare-ups. But that all changed yesterday when Lena tweeted that when she dies, she wants her casket to be driven through NYC Pride with a plaque that reads: she wasn’t for everyone, but she *was* for us. Oh no.

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Cillian Murphy Will Probably Be In The Sequel To “A Quiet Place”

March 31, 2019 / Posted by:

The A Quiet Place squeakuel – oops, sorry, that’s a different horror franchise called Alvin and the Chipmunks– I mean sequel, was announced over a year ago approximately 5 minutes after the original was released. You might think that’s TOO SOON, but the first movie brought in $340 million worldwide on just a $17 million production budget. With odds like that I’m surprised they haven’t yet announced A Quiet Place 15: Electric Boogaloo Reprise Again. The sequel is scheduled to be out on May 15, 2020 and casting is moving along with sinister Irish hottie Cillian Murphy as the sequel’s undoubtably creepy lead.

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A Swiss Tourist Is Suing The Elvis Presley Estate For Giving Him Tinnitus

October 30, 2018 / Posted by:

A Swiss man and his daughter decided to have a nice quiet vacation in America and the dad came home with a life-ruining case of tinnitus that he claims eventually broke up his marriage. According to The Blast, Hans-Peter Gauch says that while he and his daughter were staying at The Guesthouse at Graceland hotel in Memphis last October, they were awakened by a very loud fire alarm. Now he’s suing the Elvis Presley Estate for negligence and is seeking $75,000 in damages. And I hope he gets it too. I’d like to sue the EPE for exposing my ear to his terrible covers songs for decades.

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Don’t Worry, Amber Tamblyn Has Schooled David Cross About Sexism And Racism

July 5, 2018 / Posted by:

Amber Tamblyn is joining Sean Penn and James Franco in the elite club of actor/novelists. She’s got a book out called Any Man, and on a recent episode of the NPR podcast It’s Been A Minute with Sam Sanders, she described it as being about “several male survivors who are all pretty violently attacked by a female serial rapist”. Sounds like a fun summer read! But her weird book isn’t the only thing she talked about. Amber also discussed the “difficult conversations” she’s had to have with her man-child husband David Cross about his forays into racism and sexism. Don’t worry you guys, she fixed him!

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A Sequel To “A Quiet Place” Has Already Been Announced

April 26, 2018 / Posted by:

My bad, you guys. I went to see A Quiet Place in the theater and now because of me they are making a sequel. My $11 must have pushed it over the edge of profitability. According to The Hollywood Reporter, beardy Jim from The Office shushing people has turned out to be a lot of people’s kink. The movie starring and directed by John Krasinski only cost $17 million dollars to make (with an assist from John’s wife Emily Blunt) and it’s still pulling in big numbers, “meaning it will be hugely profitable”. And of course, that’s all that really matters!

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