Harry Styles has seemingly vowed to take his palate on a worldwide journey of Epicurean adventures throughout recent history; first, tethering himself to Olivia Wilde, the finest salad dressing artisan this side of the pond. Then, sampling his own podiatric soup while performing in Australia. And now, he’s taken his edacious tastebuds to the streets of Tokyo, where he and Emily Ratajkowski were just papped awkwardly tasting each other’s desperately attention-seeking mouths.
Basement Baby, Her Sister And Her Sister’s Husband Release A Joint Statement About That Elevator Smack Down
I thought I’d spare your eyeballs from more pictures of those three in their Met Gala ensembles and instead give you this precious portrait of Basement Baby during her true fashion icon days. Looking like the flag of Bolivia’s slutty sister complete with a Jay-Z toe. That is fashion.
After days of milking the elevator scandal and passively-aggressively responding to all the rumors by posting old ass pictures on Instagram, Beyonce, Jay-Z and Basement Baby shat out a statement today that said absolutely nothing. They didn’t say if the fight was about RiRi or that Rachel Roy person. They only said that Basement Baby isn’t a crackhead, she just fights like one and that they’re just like any other family. Yes, because every family handles their problems with each other by brawling in an elevator. Stop shaking your head “yes,” White Oprah, you’re not normal. Here’s the statement (via AP):
“As a result of the public release of the elevator security footage from Monday, May 5th, there has been a great deal of speculation about what triggered the unfortunate incident. But the most important thing is that our family has worked through it. Jay and Solange each assume their share of responsibility for what has occurred. They both acknowledge their role in this private matter that has played out in the public. They both have apologized to each other and we have moved forward as a united family.
The reports of Solange being intoxicated or displaying erratic behavior throughout that evening are simply false. At the end of the day families have problems and we’re no different. We love each other and above all we are family. We’ve put this behind us and hope everyone else will do the same.”
“…hope everyone else will do the same.” Like that’ll happen and like those bitches want that to happen. I’m sure that the Beygency assistant who typed this statement laughed and laughed at that part and kept on laughing until a trap door opened under their chair and they dropped into a locked cell in the basement. That’s what they get for insubordinate behavior!