Category: CODE RED
Taylor Swift Almost Admitted That The Red Scarf Jake Gyllenhaal Allegedly Stole Was Just A Metaphor
*TW* musty knitwear, obvious metaphors and presumed sexual activity between consenting adults.
Today in SHOCKING NEWS, 32-year-old adult woman Taylor Swift has nearly publicly admitted to having lost her virginity more than a decade ago to a hot older man as depicted in the 15-minute “short film” that accompanied last fall’s All To Well (Taylor’s Version), off of the rerecording of her 2012 album Red. BuzzFeed reports that Taylor brought ATW: (Taylor’s Version) The Movie, which she directed, to the Toronto International Film Festival (Taylor’s Version) and was asked to explain the meaning behind the red scarf that gets passed between the Jake Gyllenhaal stand-in Dylan O’Brien and Taylor stand-in Sadie Sink in the film. As Jake will never, ever, ever be allowed to forget, he and Taylor dated for about three months in 2010 before he allegedly stole her scarf and ghosted her on her 21st birthday, presumably because there were no other filmmakers on hand at TIFF at whom one might direct these types of critical questions about the art and craft of cinema.
Brooklyn Beckham Fuels Rumors Of A Family Feud Between Victoria Beckham And Nicola Peltz By Choosing To Vacation With Her Family Over His
*CODE RED* *CODE RED* Brooklyn Beckham did not join his family on their European mega-yacht vacation, instead he joined his new family in celebrating wifey Nicola Peltz’s memaw’s 94th birthday celebrations and “thanked her for letting him into her ‘gorgeous family.’” Brooklyn and Nicola have only been married for three months yet according to The Daily Mail, a family feud between Brooklyn’s mom Victoria Beckham and Nicola has erupted and has already reached scorched earth territory. Relatively speaking.