Before today, I didn’t know where Kanye West stood on cosmetics, besides the fact that he doesn’t like it on his child. If I had to guess what Kanye thought about makeup, based on past behavior, I probably would have assumed he’d say something like, “The only blinding highlight you need is the illumination from Jesus Christ’s glowing halo” or a confusing non-sequitur about eyebrows. Until today, the only contour I’d associate with Kanye is if he took his Sunday Service scam on the road. Get it? Con tour? The point here is that Kanye has filed a trademark update on his Yeezy brand to include beauty and skincare products.
We all know that the Yeezy trademark currently applies to fugly shoes and sad clothing, and it looks like very soon it will also apply to lipstick and setting spray. TMZ says that Kanye’s company recently filed trademark papers for products like fake eyelashes, nail polish, body lotion, shampoo, and face masks. Khloé Kardashian probably just got really excited by the idea of being able to buy her next face direct from her brother-in-law, but it’s not that kind of face mask.
Kim Kardashian already has her own makeup line, KKW Beauty. And we all know about Kylie Jenner’s billion dollar-ish cosmetics empire. But neither of them has to worry about Kanye coming in and cutting into their business model. Because Kanye is getting the trademark for Yeezy, which means it will be an offshoot of the Yeezy brand. Like, we’re not about to see heavily Photoshopped pictures of Kanye smearing Kanye Koncealer™ over his under-eye bags.
Also, he might just be securing the trademark in case he wants to one day dip his toe into the cosmetics and self-care industries. TMZ points out that he applied for a trademark in 2017 on DONDA, the company he named after his late mother, Donda West. At the time, Kanye was applying for a trademark on makeup, perfumes, lotions, and various cosmetic applications. But, that never really materialized. It’s not known if Kanye’s plan has already gone into production, or if he’s just covering his legal bases before he starts.
According to his most recent trademark application, he’s also looking to get into scents. Kanye has reportedly asked that the Yeezy trademark cover scented pine cones and aromatherapy pillows. Scented pillows and pine cones? I wonder what they’ll smell like? You know what, I don’t think I want to know. Can we really trust Kanye’s nose when it comes to olfactory aesthetics? After all, he’s spent the better part of the last decade with his head stuck up his own ass.