Category: Going Green

Prince Harry Got Shit For Taking A Private Jet After Lecturing About Climate Change

August 23, 2021 / Posted by:

Prince Harry fancies himself an environmental activist. Back in May, he went on Oprah’s Apple TV+ series The Me You Can’t See and said that climate change was one of the world’s most pressing issues. But last Thursday he figured it wasn’t that pressing and took a rich friend’s private jet from Aspen, CO to Santa Barbara, CA after playing in a charity polo match. I mean, charity is good. But private jet is bad. For the environment and for the prince’s image. To absolutely no one’s surprise, the British rags immediately labeled Harry a hypocrite. The Sun is snarkily calling him an “eco-warrior” and “woke royal.” Harry’s probably thinking, “Hmmm… The Woke Royal… can I steal that for the title of my memoirs?”

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The Oscars Will Offer A (Mostly) Plant Based Menu At The Governor’s Ball

January 28, 2020 / Posted by:

Maybe in an attempt to counteract the negative stigma of #OscarsSoWhite, The Academy Of Motion Pictures would like you to consider making #OscarsSoGreen trend instead. Following in the footsteps of The Golden Globes and the SAG Awards, the Academy has decided to green it up by offering a (mostly) plant based menu. According to The Daily Mail, The Academy has announced that the Oscars will be “completely green”, whatever that means. Who’s gonna check them on this? Is there an international board of green certifiers who do a walk-through with a clip board saying, “those centerpieces are a shade too teal, that’s 25 demerits!Joaquin Phoenix simply does not have the time! He’s busy trying to brush all the dirt out of his suit from the SAG Awards.

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Coldplay Is Taking A Break From Touring Until They Can Make It More Environmentally Friendly

November 21, 2019 / Posted by:

Damn Chris Martin! He’s (temporarily) neutralized my Gwyneth Paltrow incest jokes with a single blow. Chris’ band Coldplay is doing a nice thing, and even though I’d rather have a grubby toddler who just ate a tuna fish sandwich whisper jokes in my ear on a hot day than attend a Coldplay concert, I have to give credit where it’s due. According to CNN, Coldplay will be taking a break from touring (please hold your applause, that’s not the mitzvah) in order to find a way to make it more environmentally friendly (you may now clap. Or roll your eyes. Or shit your pants, I’m not the boss of you!).

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