I’m sure back in the 1970s when legendary Motown singer Diana Ross famously requested to “touch me in the morning..” this isn’t exactly what she had in mind. Because after encountering an allegedly very grabby TSA agent at Louis Armstrong New Orleans International Airport, she is letting everyone know that Miss Ross isn’t here for any early morning inappropriate touching at all.
In case you didn’t know from her nearly two-month premature self “Happy Birthday to ME!” at the Grammy’s, it’s Diana Ross’ 75thbirthday, and she had a major blowout bash in Hollywood that included quite a clusterfuck of a guest list. On the one hand, you had Beyoncé, who has spent most of her career likening herself to the Supreme and seemed like a natural fit to perform. On the other hand, you had Khloe Kardashian because, uh, Diana shops at Marshall’s?
In “Girl What Is You Doing?” news, Barbra Streisand had to “clarify” some comments she made about Michael Jackson’s accusers. While promoting an upcoming concert over in jolly old England, Barbra let out a nugget of crazy WTF about Wade Robson and James Safechuck. If you need a refresh on what earned Barbra the award for The Worst Take, here you go:
“His sexual needs were his sexual needs, coming from whatever childhood he has or whatever DNA he has. You can say ‘molested’, but those children, as you heard say (the grown-up Robson and Safechuck), they were thrilled to be there. They both married and they both have children, so it didn’t kill them.”
That take is like butter gone rancid and covered in shit. I guess basically defending an alleged pedophile is not the coolest thing to do in 2019? Weird. Well, now Barbra is doing the thing which is very cool in 2019: apologizing for the problematic things she said
Page A D is reporting that there is someone out there who has completely lost their damn mind! While performing at a show recently, iconic diva extraordinaire with hair that won’t quit Miss Diana Ross was assaulted by a psychopath! Someone, who must’ve been absent the day in preschool when we all learned to keep our paws to ourselves, poked her as she performed.
Diana Ross has been a musical icon for decades and last night she chose to turn the Grammy’s into The Diana Ross Show where the awards ceremony was just something to do once she left the stage. But first, before we were treated to Diana’s mountain of talent (and hair) she was introduced by her 9-year-old grandson Raif-Henok Kendrick, the son of Diana’s eldest love child Rhonda Ross and grandson of music mogul Berry Gordy. And let’s just say you can tell he could have taken all of the shine had Diana not been backstage watching him like “Make it quick sonny, MomMom got a show to do!”
Since it’s Thanksgiving and most of us here at Dlisted are going to spend the rest of the day making our stomachs and bowels sing “AH’M BEGGING FOR YOU MER-SAAAAAY!” by shoving pounds of meat into our face holes like we’re a power bottom at a pass around Patty orgy, we’re pressing pause on our regularly scheduled programming of foolery today. But I will leave you with the Empress of the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, Diana Ross, waving to her subjects while wearing the carcass of a Yeti. Diana also performed and proved that her voice is so powerful that she doesn’t need a stupid mic to fill the land with it, and she is such a talented goddess that she can sing without even moving her lips!