Jesse James Got Married To Former Porn Star Bonnie Rotten
Pretty much every time we’ve had to hear about former owner of West Coast Choppers/Current CEO of Jesse James Firearms Unlimited, Jesse James (or Vanilla Gorilla, as he’s unlovingly been referred to here at Dlisted during his long tenure of improprieties), it’s usually because he said something gross, did something gross, or screwed one or multiple gross women while still being married. In more positive news, I guess (for who, I’m not sure), he just tied the knot with former porn star, Bonnie Rotten.
On Saturday, Jesse, 53, and Bonnie (real name: Alaina Hicks), 29, got married in a casual backyard celebration in Texas–of course, because that’s where all of the dark magic happens these days. via Page Six:
For the ceremony, the bride wore a white floor-length gown with a long train and sleeves made of lace. Her short veil cascaded down her long, dark locks, and she completed the look with white cowgirl boots…[she] held a bouquet of pink and white flowers as she made her way to the altar with one of the couple’s French bulldogs by her side.
The groom opted for a less traditional look, sporting dark gray slacks and a matching vest, which he wore over a white collared button-down and gold tie. He kept things casual by rolling up his sleeves and finishing off the outfit with a cream-colored fedora.
The couple — who got engaged in April — changed into more comfortable clothing for the reception, where they cut their two-tier cake using a cleaver made by the “glorified welder” himself.
I didn’t peep any of Jesse’s beloved swastikas anywhere and fellow anti-Semitic turd Mel “Sugar Tits“ Gibson didn’t officiate, but here’s abscessed anal pustule, Alex Jones, sitting right next to the bride at the head table giving us “farting dad at the hardware store who insists he knows more than the people who work there but somehow can’t locate the hammers and now everyone will suffer” energy:
Alex Jones apparently just attended pornstar Bonnie Rotten’s wedding.
byu/DebbieDunnbbar inJoeRogan
And in the last video of Jesse’s Instagram carousel highlighting the day, Alex even gave the most basic bitch of toasts ever, but at least didn’t mention gay frogs or whatever shit he’s on a rant about at the moment. Also peep that Bible verse Jesse used as a caption. “That’s rich!” cackled every woman who’s ever come into contact with him.
https://www.instagram.com/p/CfRdSzfLa9q/
I’m still stuck on Jesse sporting a fedora: the official hat of douchey wandering dick (at least if it’s him wearing it). This is Jesse’s fifth marriage, several of which–including his marriage to Sandra Bullock– reportedly ended due to his inability to keep his fuck parts to himself. He was also engaged to Kat Von D for a bit before allegedly raw-dogging 19 different women behind her back. This marks Bonnie’s second marriage; her first husband was musician, Dennis Desantis. So, the odds are in no one’s favor here, but let’s hope it lasts just so no other woman finds themselves tangled in Jesse’s infectious web. Texas has enough on their plate and I’m not sure there are enough antibiotics to go around.
Pic: Instagram